Fake Cell Phone for Screen Addicts
A one-step detox program for the most serious mobile phone offenders, this seemingly useless piece of plastic might be the best little investment you’ll ever make to save a loved one from a life of virtual addiction. A no-risk, idiot-proof security blanket for those who refuse to quit swiping, touch typing and face-timing their way through life, this may just be their best chance at cellular sobriety. Help is just one fake call away!
The lucky recipient of these handy hi-tech gloves will be dressed to impress at any outdoor excursion or special ops affair. The ultimate in wireless fashion accessories, these snug-fitting paw protectors will keep your pal connected at all times and make them the envy of every screen-hungry mobile phone junkie from San Francisco to Dubai. Even 007 will be begging to get his hands on these ultra cool mobility mitts. Those hands were made for talking!
This made-to-order voodoo doll is the perfect gift for your most vengeful friend. Just send in an image of who you want the doll to resemble, and the magic happens as your friend pushes pins into the doll’s most sensitive areas. Just be sure it doesn't look anything like you.
For the musician who hates music, or for the kid whose parents you hate, there is the Otamatone, a “musical” instrument that makes the bagpipes seem reasonable. A touch sensitive bar on the neck changes pitch, while the little mouth at the bottom “sings” when squeezed. It all makes perfect sense (in Japan).
Bring toast into the twenty-first century with the most narcissistic toaster yet! Metal inserts will brown your beautiful face onto every piece of toast you make. Freak out your one-night stand with breakfast in bed featuring edible pictures of yourself. Just make sure to smile!
Relieving yourself into an empty beer can might seem like a bright idea, but it doesn’t quite make the grade at the country club golf course. For all those chaps who can’t seem to get that coveted hole-in-one, this discreet port-a-potty is the next best thing. That handy-dandy golf towel wasn’t just made for polishing the five irons … talk about the perfect-sized curtain for answering the call of nature. Don’t let a full bladder spoil your eagle on the 9th hole. Drain that lizard in style and tee up like a true gentleman!
Keep your head and face warm without the commitment (or testosterone) it takes to grow an actual beard! These knit beanies with detachable face fur are as funny as they are functional. From biker to barbarian, Viking to vagabond, there is a Beard Head for every taste and style.
This killer accessory is hardly a gag gift. The recipient of this fine headwear will be commanding respect on the racquetball court and sopping up sweat in style while weed whacking the front lawn. There’s something irresistibly strapping about mullets, and there’s no doubt they’ll reemerge as a hairdo trend if not in this decade, certainly the next. Of course, the lucky stallion that’s sporting this feathered mane has to have the proper attitude to match and that just can’t be taught, so give wisely, my friend!
Perfect for lazy Sunday mornings on the bridge, these Original Show style bathrobes come in gold, blue, or red, and feature an embroidered insignia above the left breast and rank stripes on the arms. Drink coffee and explore the quadrant in these 100% cotton or microfleece ultra-casual uniforms.