Fish Training Kit
Show your weird friend that they are the weirdest kind of weird by giving them the tools to train a goldfish to play basketball and soccer. Yes, you read that right. With a little diligence it is possible to teach a fish some tricks. If you immediately know who you would give this to, you owe it to yourself to make this happen.
Wearing this might get someone labeled a paranoid schizophrenic or mistaken for someone with an uncontrollable urge to bite others, but that’s the price you pay for protecting yourself from whoever is listening in, be it the government, aliens, or worse yet, alien government agencies. That’s the world we live in. This is the answer.
Get back to nature with some jewelry made out of dead bugs. Insects are some of the animal kingdom’s strangest creatures, and the brightest and most beautiful have been chosen for these unique pendants. It takes a special kind of weirdo to rock one of these.
There are a lot of weird musical instruments out there, but many of them don’t make great gifts since it takes effort to learn how to play them. Not so with the Otamatone! There’s just not that much to know. Squeeze the bottom and it makes noise. Run your fingers up and down the neck, and it makes noise. See what we mean?
For your punk-rock friend with a not-so-punk pet, spray-on PetPaint can make any fur-covered beast look like a total badass. Color the cat and dye the dog in nearly every color you can imagine. It even comes in brown for some reason!
Give them the gift of their own personal Finland with this hot and steamy portable sauna. There’s nothing weird about rejuvenating mind and body in the comfort of home, while head and hands are free to hold a book and read outside the heat - it just looks a little weird. Okay, maybe more than a little.
This bizarre cuckoo clock features characters from every weirdo’s favorite holiday movie, “The Nightmare Before Christmas.” Jack Skellington, his ghost dog Zero, and friends from Halloweentown play the song “This Is Halloween” every hour.
We all have that one friend. The one who can never seem to find that steady relationship. The one with a cat or two. And then three. And four. The one who starts to show up to parties, on the rare occasions she does show up, increasingly covered in cat hair. This book. This book is for her.
Your friend or loved one may have already started to suspect something about the inherent absurd futility of life. If not, then perhaps you can inform them with this gift, which is an extraordinarily apt illustration of the horrifying predicament in which we the living find ourselves. Doing exactly what it says on the package, this box has no purpose other than to instantly turn itself ‘off’ when you try to turn it ‘on’. Despite being useless, we have to admit it does have a certain charm.