Follow Me Bring Beer Sandals
Help your friend stop wasting time talking when they could be drinking by getting them these sandals. Don’t forget to make fun of them for it: “Hey, look, I found you in flipflop form.” They’ll thank you for helping them make the process of getting beer more efficient — if they’re not wasted, that is.
It’s amazing to think that the idea giving someone a kit to take a sample of their own DNA, that will then be sent off and analyzed, resulting in a detailed personalized genetic analysis, would have seemed like total science fiction just a few decades ago. But here we are.
If they are not living out their childhood sandbox dreams of operating a bulldozer or a backhoe at this age, chances are it’s not going to happen. Tough luck, kid. At least you can let them live that dream for a day by buying them a trip to Extreme Sandbox.
We’re not saying you should buy someone a South African Gold Krugerrand for 1300 bucks or whatever it is - though that would be an incredible 30th birthday gift, holy crap - just that precious metal coins are fun to have. You can get an American Silver Eagle for like $20, and it’s almost as cool.
Years ago, we were all told not to play with our food. Now the highest paid, most famous chefs in the world are doing just that, and nobody thinks to slap the gelified calcium chloride out of their hands. This is the food the Jetsons would have been eating if they were more sophisticated.
We love this gift idea for the person turning 30 who has put down some roots and is planning to stay put for a while. Fill it with anything - pictures, words, a bottle of something, whatever - and bury it together in a place they’ll be in 30 more years. It will be an even better gift the year you dig it back up together.
Most people would buy these to experiment with cooking, but any cooking is good if it’s free and it’s for you. Use this gift as an excuse to mooch off the 30-year-old in your life. “Have you tried my gift yet? Why don’t I come over and we can use it together?” Using that excuse too much can be dicey though and it may end up with your friend purposefully cooking questionable cuisine.
If the thirtieth birthday is a time to take stock of one’s financial health, why not make the stock-taking literal as well as figurative? With a gift of stock, you can set someone on a path of investment that can make all the difference when they want to retire a lifetime from now.
Breaking down and having to call your dad for help is bad enough at 16 – by 30, you’ve outgrown that drama. The gift of an AAA Membership will mean they don’t even need to admit they had an auto-related problem – allowing them to retain the aura of cool, calm and collected adult, who has their s**t together. Ha!