Molecular Gastronomy Kit
Years ago, we were all told not to play with our food. Now the highest paid, most famous chefs in the world are doing just that, and nobody thinks to slap the gelified calcium chloride out of their hands. This is the food the Jetsons would have been eating if they were more sophisticated.
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Along with abundance comes the responsibility not to bore the crap out of people by making the same silly casserole every night. The problem is that nobody wants to think that much about food. They just want to eat. Place the burden of creativity - and blame - on these ingenious foodie dice, and watch the possibilities multiply.
In an ideal world, every home would have its own draft beer on tap. If that’s a gift you can afford, then by all means, please get them a draft beer tap. For the rest of us, there is the next best thing. This beer dispenser uses sound waves and pressure to transform any canned or bottled beer into beer you would swear came fresh from the tap.
So many of your household appliances would be better if they weren’t fixed in place. Wouldn’t you sometimes like to bake in the backyard? Do the laundry on your roof deck? And what about the toilet? Wouldn’t you like to…well, never mind. For now, we’ve got the inflatable hot tub. Move it, deflate and store it, set it back up and inflate it in three minutes whenever it’s needed.
Why bike through the real world when you can bike through the more interesting one someone else created? And consider the safety difference. A small spill in the real world could leave them with a broken arm or worse; a VR game allows them to experience the rush of having their head blown off by a rogue bandit in an apocalyptic world, then go eat breakfast. No comparison.
Nothing makes you feel more at home in a foreign place than knowing the right way to tell someone to go f*ck himself. Don’t let a traveler you know venture off into the great unknown without arming them first with this essential guidebook. No matter where you end up on this great planet of ours, respect follows those who command the rough outer edges of the language.
Chocolates used to (and perhaps still do) come from factories run by shady recluses and populated by obese midget slaves. Or at least that’s what the video evidence suggests. But it doesn’t have to be that way anymore. Stick it to big business by giving someone this home chocolate making kit and help them join the artisan revolution. A whole new way to make chocolate “guilt free”.
Pepper is an in-your-face spice, and its essence has nothing to do with subtlety. Here is the perfect vessel for the preeminent seasoning at the table. Let this beautifully crafted ebony grinder tower over the other lowly flavors, including its eternal rival, salt. Any other symbolism we’ll leave up to your imagination.
Sturdier, more convenient, and easier to handle than traditional kabob skewers. No more forgetting to buy skewers and having to eat raw steak and vegetables or cook with their bare hands. Not every brilliant solution has to be high tech. Some just make a lot of damn sense.