Refrigerator End Table
Save your favorite college student the indignity of walking back and forth from the couch to the kitchen for a beer. We put a man on the moon for God’s sake. Hand-made by Amish craftsmen and built to last for generations, this is no flimsy Walmart furniture. Class out the wazoo.
Here is a compilation of tips, tricks, hints and advice for the college bound student. For example, did you know that instead of taking a shower and cleaning up their dorm room they can spread dry tea bags around to absorb the odor? Or instead of keeping their shoes off the coffee table they can use oil and vinegar to get the scratches out. There are lots of useful ideas in here that can help one navigate through these challenging years of academics and hygiene.
Polaroids may be dead, but the people who like to use them aren’t. Not all of them anyway. There’s something especially gratifying about holding a tangible photograph, especially in a world dominated by virtual commodities where everything is becoming digital. Having an instant printer on hand means they don’t have to wait for a photo printing company to print their photos from the cloud and mail them by horseback or whatever. And we all know that nobody has time to wait for a horse these days. Oh, and we should also mention: these look way better than Polaroids.
Their toothbrush cleans their mouth, but then what cleans their toothbrush? How have you not been thinking about this? If you don’t have one of these, your mouth and your toothbrush are just playing volleyball with all that crap that comes off your teeth. Life is gross enough without walking around with a bacteria factory in your face.
For many wide-eyed young adults, the future looks ripe with opportunity as they imagine the glorious journey they’ll have while turning all their dreams into realities. Of course we know, most of those dreams will not materialize and many enthusiastic attempts at success will end in miserable failure. As this enlightening book explains, this seemingly endless floundering is actually the typical path towards real prosperity. Most of the important lessons in life are learned through mistakes and failures, lessons that culminate at some point (even if through sheer brute force and stubborn determination) in eventual success.
This high-tech notebook combines the best of cutting-edge technology and old fashioned pen and paper. Send notes directly to the cloud using the Rocketbook smartphone app, and erase the notebook for reuse up to five times using a microwave. For real. Now if you could only microwave away your long history of embarrassing Instagram posts.
Since the dawn of time, chaos, terror, and death have periodically rained down from the sky. Only the lucky were spared. But now we have weather radios, so you can go inside instead of dying. This one also conveniently charges your phone so the next hurricane doesn’t have to interrupt your game of angry birds.
Keep your head and face warm without the commitment (or testosterone) it takes to grow an actual beard! These knit beanies with detachable face fur are as funny as they are functional. From biker to barbarian, Viking to vagabond, there is a Beard Head for every taste and style.
Drinking coffee is for amateurs: give the gift of intense doses of caffeine. Help them run marathons, finish difficult projects, and—if they eat too many—question if their eye is supposed to be twitching. As a gift to you, if you ever need to paint your house, get them on board – they can see way more colors than you can now.