Custom Face Socks
Though it is roundly considered bad taste to put socks on your face, no taboo exists against doing the opposite. In fact, rocking a pair of face socks is likely to thrust one several notches up the status meter. It’s one of the most underutilized fashion secrets known to modern man (and modern woman). The ancient books counsel that power and prestige await those who carry the human countenance upon their footwear. These are truly the gateway to greater things.
We are not kidding around; this thing is BIG. It holds twenty cups of coffee, at least, which ought to be enough to keep even your sleepiest friends awake until at least mid-afternoon. This giant mug is a perfect funny gift for people who are serious about their coffee.
Aggression sometimes gets a bad name, but the truth is that it’s only dangerous if misdirected. Many things in life should be aggressively pursued, such as happiness, growth, meaning, contribution — all of the warm and fuzzy stuff you see on posters. However, some people also feel the impulse to aggressively pursue verbal confrontation, or worse, opportunities to punch other people’s faces. For these folks, alternative avenues of release are really helpful. Here’s an opportunity to bring one of these alternative avenues to the most stressful environment of all: the workplace.
Welcome. It’s nice, we guess, but how sincere does it seem as you are wiping your boots or knocking on the door? Wouldn’t you love to open your door to guests who are already laughing at your jokes? Get the perfect doormat to make your friends laugh every time they come or go.
Your friend or loved one may have already started to suspect something about the inherent absurd futility of life. If not, then perhaps you can inform them with this gift, which is an extraordinarily apt illustration of the horrifying predicament in which we the living find ourselves. Doing exactly what it says on the package, this box has no purpose other than to instantly turn itself ‘off’ when you try to turn it ‘on’. Despite being useless, we have to admit it does have a certain charm.
When we say ugly Christmas sweater, what we actually mean is FUNNY Christmas sweater, and these are absolutely hilarious. Get one as a gag for everyone on your list and wait for the laughs (and heartfelt thank yous!) to start rolling in. Your loved ones will be rolling too, with laughter.
For those that like a challenge, this wall clock’s hands run counterclockwise, which makes telling time a real chore. We suggest secretly replacing a friend’s regular clock with the backwards version just to see how long it takes for them to notice this lovely gift. If only it could turn back time for real.
Giant fish that swim in the air? Isn’t that against the very laws of nature? Yeah, kind of, we guess, but these are filled with helium and are controlled with a remote, so it’s really not as dramatic as all that. Stays inflated for up to two weeks, and can be refilled over and over again.
Is this sexy loungewear or what?! Sci-fi doesn’t just have to live on the big screen … galactic space fashion has invaded the cozy world of terry cloth and no closet should be without it. Stylish and futuristic, this fitting nod to the Star Wars empire should be an essential piece in every superfan’s closet. Give the tired robe look a visionary facelift with this droid-lover’s keepsake … the starship is waiting!