Gifts For The Man Who Has Everything

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Rest assured, it only seems like he has everything. Most likely, if you took an honest inventory, he just has a barnful of stereotypically dude-oriented stuff, most of it collecting dust. And every day he dies inside a little because he wants to expand his horizons but can’t for the life of him figure out how to claw his way out of his dude-oriented stuff bubble. If you help him bust out of it, he’ll never forget you. And if he really has everything on this page, go ahead and send us his name and we’ll try our best to set up a reality show about him.

Among this gift’s many wonderful attributes is that it never runs out - so it’s always there, always in the same condition in which you bought it. It also never breaks, can’t be stolen, needs no virtual updates, has no hidden costs or fees, and may or may not be the source of everything (we haven’t yet confirmed). In so many ways, it’s the perfect gift.

Almost everyone has a bucket list. But if you talk to enough people, you’ll find that a lot of those buckets are kind of empty. The Bucket List Experiences Gift Box allows you to dump a whole bunch of stuff into someone’s bucket, and let them pull one of those things out for free. It’s simple: for a flat price, you buy them access to a whole list of unique activities and experiences at locations across the world, and they get to choose whichever one tickles their fancy the most.

mBerry tablets are a natural product derived from berries that temporarily alter your perception of taste by binding to your taste buds and tricking your brain. It’s a pretty crazy experience and would make a memorable gift that they’ll be telling stories about for years. The tablets make sour and bitter things taste sweet. You can chow down on a lemon and swear it tastes like an orange. Vinegar tastes like apple juice. Hot sauce and spicy foods become sugary and beer tastes like Kool-aid.

We can’t emphasize this enough: you ride the motorized cooler full of drinks to the party, you drink its contents, and then you WALK it back home. Nobody wants to be the guy on the news who got arrested for drunk driving an empty cooler. So stay safe.

Someone who has it all has probably been around the block a few times. Help them celebrate their journeys with this elegant travel map that displays all the places they’ve been, and the places they’d still like to go. Available as a US or world map.

The most important things in a person’s life aren’t things at all. They’re memories, experiences and relationships. This clever game is designed to help them recall stories and memories they haven’t thought of in years, and is a great way to reflect on the crazy path that has gotten them where they are today.

If he’s the kind of person who likes to go big or go home, go one better and let him go big at home with these giant yard games. Perfect for anyone with a bit of a competitive streak, they’ll provide hours of fun for him to play with family or friends, and given that they’re huge, he won’t lose them among all his other belongings.

The last thing you want to get a man who has everything, is something that he already has, which is everything, so that doesn’t leave you many options. Luckily there is one exception. One thing that a man can never have enough of, and you can have this thing shipped to his door every month. Let’s face it, a man doesn’t really have everything unless he has ALL the bacon.

Your pet once ruled the kingdom, and perhaps they still do! Honor them with a beautiful and one-of-a-kind personalized Renaissance Pet Portrait. Artists will transform your pet into a stunning masterpiece. Simply select an amusing outfit and upload an image of your pet. Printed with museum-quality inks and paper, your portrait will look and feel like it belongs in a museum. If Renaissance isn't your pet's style, there a lots of other hilarious choices.

Sharkbanz tell sharks we aren't food and aren't worth investigating. Sharks use electroreception (sensitivity to electric fields) to hunt and navigate. Sharkbanz powerful deterrent field is exponentially greater than any electric field a shark would naturally encounter. Sharkbanz do not harm sharks or any other ocean animal, but signals sharks to stay away. Marine biologists compare this deterrent sensation a shark feels to a "bright light" suddenly shining in your eyes when in a dark room. It is always ON and does not use batteries nor require any charging. The tech is simple and effective.

He may have everything, but none of it will do him any good if he's dead. Help the man who has everything stick around long enough to use it all with this guide book that details every possible way things could go horribly wrong.

A virtual cooking class with Gordon Ramsay is a chance to learn from a culinary master without the yelling and food punching you've seen on TV. His MasterClass lessons feature the seven-star Michelin chef in his home kitchen teaching everything from kitchen setup, buying ingredients, prepping, plating, and pairing restaurant quality recipes that wow guests. Crispy duck with red endive and spinach anyone?

Why are they still struggling to light a charcoal fire when there’s a 90 billion megaton flaming ball hanging above us? Help them learn to be more resourceful with this reflective solar cooker, then let daylight do the rest. The reflective surface condenses the sun’s rays on the food, letting them grill, steam, slow-cook, or pan fry their favorite dishes under the clear blue sky, and all with a minimal level of human input. Sometimes simpler really is better.

If they’ve got everything they could ever want or need, then congratulations are in order. How did they achieve this good fortune? What are the building blocks that created such a successful person? Help them unearth their unique personal story with this telling look into their genealogy.

At a certain point, when you have too much stuff, more things just don’t do it for you anymore. At that point, if you’re smart, you start investing in superpowers. And trust us on this: every single man on the planet was a kid once, and every one of those kids wanted the power to see in the dark. To go where other humans cannot, to walk among the wild nocturnal animals as an equal, and to hide from their parents. They may not need to hide from their parents anymore, but that doesn’t make night vision any less awesome.

The beer world has truly exploded with breweries over the last decade-plus, which is great for anyone who likes trying new things. However, this proliferation of choice has a dark side. Dyed-in-the-wool beer lovers now face overwhelming anxiety every time they go to pick up a six pack or fill up a growler. The Craft Beer Club removes this pain point by making the necessary choices for all involved, so beer time can go back to being the sweet revelation it used to be.

It can be hard to try and buy a keepsake for someone who owns more or less everything you can think of, so sometimes an experience he’ll never forget is the best way to go. If you’re looking for a day out that is truly memorable, going full speed around a race course in a car they could normally only dream of driving is sure to put you on the fast-track to greatest gift giver ever.

Bunster’s Shit the Bed Hot Sauce is a mix of super-hot chilies and healthy superfoods (like goji berries and apple cider vinegar). It’s also a crowdfunding phenomenon and a painfully delicious gift for any health-conscious masochist you might know. There are lots of gourmet hot sauces out there, but this one is unique and strange in a way that true hot sauce connoisseurs find irresistible. Their mouth is bound to have a love-hate relationship with this stuff.

If flowers could get you drunk, men would be all about bouquets. Until then, replace the posies and roses with distilled spirits and ale, and your manly recipient will be as woozy and giddy as a schoolgirl who just got her first love note. After a long day of doing man things, all he really wants is to relax and recover in the glow of a nice warm buzz. And every time he does, he’ll remember you, and think to himself what great taste you have.

He may think he has everything, but can he take a chicken breast from raw to edible in the blink of an eye? Can he get the perfect char on a steak in the time it takes someone to point at the oven and say, “What the hell is that?” If he doesn’t have one of these, then the answer is probably no. Learning to harness the elements is an ongoing struggle for mankind, but with the Inferno, we’ve come a little closer to catching fire in a bottle.

How many times have they said, “I know this town like the back of my hand”? Present them with this accurate jigsaw representation, sit back, and ask them to prove it. Or stoke their nostalgia with a puzzle version of their long-lost birthplace. A great choice for a more personalized gift.

Sure, some DIYers like to be hands on, but in your heart of hearts, you know that if you offered to make beer easier, nobody’s going to turn you down. Because turning down easy beer is like turning down free beer - it’s the kind of decision your reputation never quite recovers from. With everything we have to do in a given day just to hold our hectic lives together, being able to push a button and create beer almost seems too good to be true. But it’s not. Good lord, how could life get any better?

As far as unusable real estate goes, this isn’t a bad deal. Buy swampland in Florida and everyone thinks (actually, knows) you’re a poor, sad, gullible boob who’s open to being taken advantage of. Own some land on the moon, on the other hand, and you’re sort of a lazy pioneer. It’s a long way to go for a vacation, and whoever you give this to probably can’t afford to make the trip, but if they ever figure out how to make this whole space taxi thing work, their great grandkids might just get some use out of it.

DIY

So they’ve got everything huh? Everything sounds pretty great if you’re thinking of it in terms of possessions, but “everything” also includes some less exciting things like chores. If they’ve got everything, they’ve got chores, unfinished projects and to-do lists. Perhaps the most valuable gift would be a little sweat of your brow?

So they have everything? Are you sure? Do they have a live lobster? They do now that you're on the case. You can head out to sea and find one, or just send them one in the mail. To make this unusual experience even more surprising, don't tell them it's coming.

These aren’t just any old toothpicks, they’re a touch of after-dinner luxury for the refined gentleman or anyone who’s enthusiastic about their scotch and single malt. These make the perfect gift for someone who appreciates quaint and quirky things, and when you’re dealing with a man who owns everything there is to own, quaint and quirky is probably the way you need to go.

Sturdier, more convenient, and easier to handle than traditional kabob skewers. No more forgetting to buy skewers and having to eat raw steak and vegetables or cook with their bare hands. Not every brilliant solution has to be high tech. Some just make a lot of damn sense.

A book is more than just a collection of words and ideas. It’s a frozen piece of time — the intersection of one person’s (or sometimes multiple peoples’) thoughts and experiences with the moment in which they were recorded. So sometimes a 50th reprint of To Kill a Mockingbird just doesn’t seem to carry the same weight that it should. Serious book lovers love first editions, because they’re a tangible piece of cultural history.

These days, real furniture does double duty. When you see how far telephones have come, it makes you wonder how much more you should be asking from other household items like tables, chairs, TV stands, and so forth. The bottom line is that furniture’s been getting off easy for far too long. Well, this table’s out to change all of that. With a built-in refrigerator drawer, touch screen controls, and laptop/phone charging capabilities, here is a piece of furniture that’ll truly earn the space it occupies.

Unless you’re scouring the internet looking for a gift for John Travolta, we’d hedge our bets on the man who has everything not having his own private plane. Let him live out his boyhood dreams with a day mastering the basics of flying. A word of warning, you might have to start budgeting for next years present now if he gets a taste for life in the skies.

If he has everything, we bet he has some things he doesn’t want too, like chores. Make his life a little bit easier with and relieve him of his weekly shopping woes by having his groceries delivered direct to his door. And if you’re buying this for someone you live with, the tedious task won’t fall to you either.

For the coffee and donut addicts of the world, it’s hard to believe that anything could improve this heavenly pairing. But that will make it all the more mind-blowing when they realize you have indeed given them something that will take the experience to another level. This truly ingenious piece of kitchen/office-ware provides the perfect platform on which the two elements meet to create the true breakfast of champions. Because if you’re going to do it, you might as well do it right.

As any connoisseur of nightwear knows, nothing can ruin a good evening like having to climb into an ice cold pair of pajamas. It’s enough to undo all of the day’s hard-won psychological victories. Conversely, a roasty, toasty pair of pajamas is enough to make one feel like the King or Queen of planet Earth, even at the end of a thoroughly difficult or miserable day. Great for home or travel.

Get them started on that Bucket List while there’s time and health to finish it, with a tangible, physical bucket. They can pick an adventure whenever life permits. It's a gift that gives them the opportunity to make memories, rather than giving them a reason to make more closet space.

Does the man you’re trying to buy a gift for own an absolute mountain of things? Perhaps so big he needs a birds-eye view to keep them all in check? OK, so maybe not that big, but a hot air balloon ride is the great idea for a present that you don’t have to find a place to keep but will still last forever as a memory, unless he tries to keep the balloon which we strongly discourage.

Sure, it will be strange when you have to get that cheek swab from them without them knowing what you’re up to, but it will all make sense when you reveal this custom portrait that showcases their unique DNA. Or you could just give them the DNA collection kit as the gift if that’s easier. Or just swab your dog. They’ll never know the difference.

Try as they might, those frozen cocktails they’re always making in the blender never quite come out right. It’s not because they got the recipe wrong (although by the fourth batch, that’s a good bet too) - it’s because the’ve been using the wrong tools. You wouldn’t let them try to cross a lake in their car, would you? So why are you letting them try to make frozen drinks in a blender? Making a proper beach cocktail first and foremost requires using the right contraption: a specialized frozen drink maker. It’s a small investment for the gallons of glorious delight it will produce.

He thinks he owns everything he could possibly imagine, but prove him wrong with a gift that doesn’t even exist yet. Commissioning a piece of original artwork is perfect for the man who can’t possibly think of what he wants. It’s a one-of-a-kind present and what’s more satisfying than having something that no one else ever will?

Who needs photorealism when you can have the charming warmth of skillful human error? There is something undeniably touching about having an artist recreate your image by hand using the old-time tools of long-gone artistic masters. After all, any old fool can press a shutter button and spit out a photo of your homely mug. It really means something that another person was willing to stare at that photo for hours while they painstakingly recreated your form by hand, imbuing it with all the personality and living charisma of your aura. Help someone you love celebrate a cherished moment the old fashioned way.

Give them an experience they’ll never forget by replacing everything with nothing. A sensory deprivation session is a unique gift that will really open their eyes to the meaning of nothingness, which is ironic since they won’t be able to see anything.

Nothing gets the ol’ blood pumping like a good old fashioned murder mystery. The only problem is that once you’ve been through a few of them, you start running out of friends. CosyKiller is the perfect answer to this problem. Once a month, the subscriber gets a box full of various clues surrounding a fictitious murder, and over the course of the year they try to solve the puzzle of who committed the crime. It’s like getting to be a high-profile murder detective for a year, but with no real-world consequences if they blow it.

You could just get them a gift card to a spa or for a massage, but why not go for a more interesting experience like cryotherapy? It’s basically a box you get into to get blasted by ridiculously cold air for a short period of time. Advocates say that the treatment rejuvenates the body and helps repair tissue damage. If your town doesn't have a cryotherapy place yet you could try a bathtub full of ice and a big fan.

You’d think there would be some kind of award for a person who’s managed to accumulate such an impressive amount of possessions over the years. While we can’t think of one off the top of our heads, we think that a title would suffice and Laird (or Lady, if he prefers) sounds just about right. Lord of the Man Cave, maybe?

Conventional cookbooks are a longstanding staple of old time kitchens. But accepted as they are, they have a fatal flaw: they were written by total strangers, and therefore deserve to be regarded cynically by sophisticated modern users. The Family Recipes cookbook solves this problem, giving the owner a template that can be filled in with delicious instructions for cookery straight from the hands and minds of trusted kinfolk. Don’t let someone you care about fall prey to the demented culinary whims of some deranged outsider.

Let the man who has everything make the musical world his oyster with this self-contained hootenanny. What looks like an old traditional gift is actually packed with up-to-date musical technology, playing over 1000 songs from a built in digital music player. He’ll feel like he practically has every song in the world at his fingertips and will never have to listen to the same song twice with this impressive feat of musical engineering.

The first time they filled the basement with batteries was just before the Y2k crisis. Or if they’re old enough, perhaps during the cold war. In both cases, nothing really happened. But maybe three times is a charm. Even if the modern world doesn’t collapse on itself, you’ll be giving them peace of mind knowing that their 84 remote controls will always be well fed.

They may have everything in the world that their heart desires, but what about the universe? Give them their very own star and let them name it, or name it after them. It is unclear whether these star deeds will hold up in inter-galactic court, but since we’re actually seeing starlight that has traveled for millions of years to reach us, it’s also unclear if these stars still exist in the first place.

People weren’t joking when they said this coffee is the sh#t. The undeniably rich, full-bodied flavor produced by these rare beans has redefined the food chain and flipped the coffee industry on its head. Perhaps one of the most imaginative adaptations of the farm-to-table movement, this coffee product is redefining waste management.

If they already have everything they need, they surely have plenty of things to stash away in this time capsule. Dig it up together sometime in the future and laugh about primitive life in the olden days when we used things like iPhones.

The world is full of natural and man-made wonders, and in the modern age we have the means to visit all of them, and furthermore to get there within a day or two. And every one of these wonders is better seen while you’re still alive, which the title of this book is not shy about pointing out. Everyone needs something to shoot for in their golden years, and 1000 is quite the ambitious number. It's a gift that will inspire them to knock the dust off the old traveling boots and regain a sense of adventure.

It’s amazing to think that giving someone a kit to take a sample of their own DNA, that will then be sent off and analyzed, resulting in a detailed personalized genetic analysis, would have seemed like total science fiction just a few decades ago. But here we are, and the kit makes a thought provoking gift. They could be related to Genghis Khan, Cleopatra, Chuck Norris, and Batman… Probably not that last one. But you can’t prove it. Now you can either both spend your lives wondering, or you can finally understand where that fixation with roundhouse kicks came from. The choice is yours.

He’s got it all, but for how long? A mortality countdown wristwatch will make sure he appreciates all he’s got while he still has it. A little reminder that eventually all that “everything” will be swallowed up by nothingness. It seems morbid at first, but the watch is intended to help people make the most out of their time. And it could always be used to countdown to something more pleasant, like retirement.

The future of food is all about making weird shapes with your dinner. Or at least that’s what the modernist chefs will have you believe. And some of the things you can make with this molecular gastronomy kit are enough to make you feel like you’re eating with the Jetsons. Spheres, foams, and chocolate spaghetti are a few of the strange treasures that await inside this bizarre culinary kit.

Traditional golf pants are one of the most identifiable sartorial statements in the history of men’s fashion. This playful golf leg table captures the timeless style in a gloriously bizarre yet classic piece of furniture. Charmingly whimsical, dignified, and refined all at once, it makes a perfect addition to any man cave, vacation home, or course-side timeshare, and it’s bound to do as much for their reputation among other golfers as shaving ten strokes off their handicap.

As your parents get older, they start forgetting things. Good memories start getting pushed out in favor of petty grievances like who forgot to take out the garbage. Enforcing positive memories through some physical, ritualized system like this can sometimes be the only way to keep them from each other’s throats. This kit comes with everything they need to record all the happy things that occur from day to day and collect them in a safe place to be relived again in the future. And it’s so much cheaper than therapy.

Everyone, from Elon Musk to your next door neighbor, is straight-up terrified of the robot takeover, envisioning all kinds of post-apocalyptic horrors being visited upon us by our own creations. But then one of them offers to mow the lawn and everyone’s like, “Well, they can’t be that bad.” And it’s true - there might be a few bad apples coming down the assembly line, but you won’t find any in the lawn mower category. Just helpful, friendly, sort-of-intelligent mini landscapers who just want you to give them a place to lay low and recharge in between jobs. Nothing to be scared of here.

If given the choice of any imaginable superpower, not many would choose “magnetic wrists.” Except, perhaps, carpenters. And the world would look upon them skeptically, until they tried out one of these magnetic wristbands for themselves. Thankfully, in a world where real superpowers are hard to come by, you can now get your own magnetic wrist for pretty cheap. And better yet, it can be removed at any time, so you’re not collecting stray parts as you go about your day. Simple technology beats superpowers every time.

The classic party game where everyone either reveals reputation-demolishing secrets about their past or shamelessly lies to save face. Depending on the temperament of the various participants, it can make for an hour or so of good-natured ribbing, or it can devolve into closet doors being flung open to reveal hideous skeletons beyond anyone’s wildest dreams. In other words, it’s rip-roaring fun. But depending on your own personal history, you may want to sit this one out.

The Mighty Carver reciprocating knife has surgical-grade stainless steel blades with machine-cut, razor-sharp serrated edges. You can hold it as you would a regular knife with the handle in the back. Or for maximum entertainment value and the complete chainsaw effect, use the top handle. Whether or not you wear the Leatherface mask is entirely up to the tenor of your family’s sense of humor.

What better way to say that the pen is mightier than the sword? This knight pen holder will be their most loyal servant in all of their clerical crusades. Whether they’re battling with the bookkeeping or feuding with their filing, help will be at hand. And yes, their grocery lists deserve the royal treatment too.

Mainstream wine snobbery has never taken hold in the New World like it did in Europe, so we use coffee and beer as vehicles to look down on each other in its place. Your grandpa may have been more than happy with a cup of Maxwell House every day for 70 years, but that was a different time. The masses have developed a palate, and there’s no looking back. But with all the thousands of artisan roasters out there, anyone trying to keep up on their own is likely to go insane. Luckily, some already insane person has taken on the job of curating, so the rest of us can pretend we’re experts.

Having to repeat yourself is such a bore. These comfortable foam sandals leave a clear message behind you, so you can give the command without opening your mouth. Trips to the beach will get a lot cheaper and easier now that your minions know exactly what to do.

This putting game combines the strategy and gameplay of billiards with mini-golfing skills. The game’s green felt surface and six “pockets” set up on a floor mimicking a pool table layout and challenges players to sink shots using clubs instead of pool cues. Players can practice their putting skills while competing in popular billiard variations such as 8 Ball, 9 Ball, or Rotation. Includes 15 regulation golf balls printed in the style of billiard balls, a white “cue ball,” triangle ball rack, and two carbon fiber putters.

Back in the old days you were really rolling the dice when you chose a hotel. Either you called blindly after skimming the phone book or simply drove all night and hoped you saw a vacancy sign before you ran out of gas and got murdered by a vagrant. A hotels.com gift card is not just a way of picking up the tab for a night’s stay; it’s also the priceless gift of peace of mind.

Alright, enough pussyfooting around. Are you gonna open that damn bottle or not? This authentic 50 caliber shell will definitively end the standoff with any stubborn bottle cap, no matter how strong a fight it’s willing to put up. The Bottle Breacher is made by and supports veterans, and might pique the interest of an ex-military or historically-minded recipient. Using an actual bullet to crack open a well-deserved beer at the end of the day is surely a much nicer use for it than originally intended.

Pepper is an in-your-face spice, and its essence has nothing to do with subtlety. Here is the perfect vessel for the preeminent seasoning at the table. Let this beautifully crafted ebony grinder tower over the other lowly flavors, including its eternal rival, salt. Any other symbolism we’ll leave up to your imagination.

Making olive oil is a time-tested mediterranean art. And they don’t put the good stuff on the shelves at Costco, no matter how ornate the adhesive label is. They make you go and find it. A true Italian or Greek food connoisseur will appreciate the difference, even if you’re clueless. Bring the finest flavors of the old world right to their table.

Some might consider it the ultimate display of human privilege to begin claiming faraway stars just because we have a few extra dollars in our pockets. But once you realize that the universe is far bigger than you think it is, you’ll cool off a little. There’s more than enough to go around for everybody. Several billion times over. So go ahead and give someone a little piece of the cosmic pie. Nothing to get all riled up about.

In a couple of generations, nobody’s even going to know what the hell a book is. Have you seen a teenager try to figure out how to use one of their parents’ audio cassettes? But for those of us in the know, books are the real source of pure knowledge and wisdom, untainted by the runoff of digital culture. Like a cold, clear mountain stream, but with words.

Different people learn in different ways. Not respecting those differences is a major reason the public education system has failed us so terribly. Some people learn visually, some learn by mimicking, and some learn by beer. This book is for the last group.

We all like to think we’re larger than life, but in truth we’re really just branches on the grand tree of our ancestry. Screw that, most of us are just leaves at best. Some of us are maybe just a little speck of caterpillar vomit on one of those leaves (you know who you are). Your family tree doesn’t have to be that detailed though.

Wombats are highly independent animals, but sometimes they need a little help getting their sh*t together. You know, just someone to make sure they’re keeping up on their paperwork and making solid life choices. That’s where an animal lover you know comes in. Kind of like a Big Brothers & Big Sisters program, but for wombats. And it’s WAY more hands-off. In fact, the adopter doesn’t have to do anything — someone else takes care of all the dirty work. They just get a little card with a cute picture of their wombat and a bunch of swag, and the satisfaction of knowing they’re keeping another potential troubled marsupial off the streets.