They say no man is an island. It’s true, we’re all the sum of the people who surround us. On your wedding day, your groomsmen are your backup band, your supporting cast. They’re the rowers propelling your ship toward destiny. In other words, you could never pull this off without them. So choose your groomsmen gifts carefully, lest you incur a mutiny at the worst time.
Everyone says thank you in a different way. Here’s a chance to say it using the recipient’s own image. Simply choose the most endearing, hilarious, embarrassing, or awesome photos of your groomsmen, and send them in to be immortalized in pint glass form. This is the bro version of commissioning a bust in honor of the people who have stood at your side through one of the most important days of your life.
Men love stuff they can cut, smash, or incinerate other stuff with. The impulse has been engraved into their genes over countless millennia by the invisible hand of evolution. Thus, a pocket knife is one of those classic gifts that is guaranteed never to disappoint. A genuine high-quality pocket knife really adds to the manliness quotient, even if they’re just sitting on the couch picking their teeth with it and watching wilderness shows.
Speed is dangerous, but some kinds are more dangerous than others. This one is mostly just fun. But be careful: once they’ve experienced the feeling of flying around the track, the engine roaring like a wild beast, the smell of smoldering rubber in the air, they may never quite be the same.
The beer world has truly exploded with breweries over the last decade-plus, which is great for anyone who likes trying new things. However, this proliferation of choice has a dark side. Dyed-in-the-wool beer lovers now face overwhelming anxiety every time they go to pick up a six pack or fill up a growler. The Craft Beer Club removes this pain point by making the necessary choices for all involved, so beer time can go back to being the sweet revelation it used to be.
Perhaps your old-time flask was made to be discreet. But we believe that the size of your flask should be determined by the occasion, not by your desire to remain anonymous in your drinking. These days, no one wants to bother trying to hide their vices.
If you’re going to do something, do it the right way. That goes for buying a knife too. The last thing you want is to be in a life and death situation and have to say, “If only I had a fine-toothed miniature saw and I knew what time it was.” This pocket knife has you covered on both fronts. The only way we could imagine this knife being more loaded is if they added a miniature cannon or gave it time travel capabilities. The perfect gift for the survivalist who likes that extra layer of security against that “what-ifs”.
If they stuffed some bacon into this box, this would be Ron Swanson’s dream gift. Offering an assortment of classic manly items like booze, old-time hair paste, leather tote bags, and quite the variety of bladed implements, this is a monthly grab bag of masculine goodies tailored to each recipient’s preferences as determined by a pre-delivery personality test. No guessing here — just solid dude gifts based on hard data and great gift-giving instincts.
Every big shot needs a set of these to take their big shots from. Help them flex their drinking muscles or show their military/hunting roots. A perfect gift for that person who really goes in for the kill at the drinkin’ hour.
Just like you wouldn’t send a samurai into battle with a pocket knife, you shouldn’t let a serious home chef attack his foodstuffs with some dull old blade off the shelves of Walmart. Bob Kramer is a certified Master Bladesmith, and the only one to specialize solely in making kitchen cutlery. In other words, this is a “next level” set of knives, one that any culinary artist would be thrilled to dice their carrots with.
If you’re looking for a subtle way to tell them that they always have spinach in their teeth, look no further than these whisky flavored toothpicks. On the plus side, you’ll no longer have to look at the salad growing in their mouth. On the downside, their breath will smell faintly of Scotch forevermore.
If flowers could get you drunk, men would be all about bouquets. Until then, replace the posies and roses with distilled spirits and ale, and your manly recipient will be as woozy and giddy as a schoolgirl who just got her first love note. After a long day of doing man things, all he really wants is to relax and recover in the glow of a nice warm buzz. And every time he does, he’ll remember you, and think to himself what great taste you have.
Bunster’s Shit the Bed Hot Sauce is a mix of super-hot chilies and healthy superfoods (like goji berries and apple cider vinegar). It’s also a crowdfunding phenomenon and a painfully delicious gift for any health-conscious masochist you might know. There are lots of gourmet hot sauces out there, but this one is unique and strange in a way that true hot sauce connoisseurs find irresistible. Their mouth is bound to have a love-hate relationship with this stuff.
Know someone who’s had a lot of close calls? Celebrate it with this bullet-embedded shot glass. A strong reminder that you never know which direction the next shitstorm is coming from, and you never know what shape it’s going to take. You might as well live it up now while you can.
Pepper is an in-your-face spice, and its essence has nothing to do with subtlety. Here is the perfect vessel for the preeminent seasoning at the table. Let this beautifully crafted ebony grinder tower over the other lowly flavors, including its eternal rival, salt. Any other symbolism we’ll leave up to your imagination.
All that advice about water and sleep is minor league stuff. You probably heard that from your mom, right after she told you that if you keep making that face it’s going to stick that way. A hangover requires science. And science is best consumed in small capsules, unless you’re really smart and prefer reading. Luckily for the person you’re buying these for, someone did all the learning already. Buy these hangover pills, and then help your friend abuse their organs with a clear conscience.
Go ahead, throw this in the white elephant gift pile and see if anyone has the balls to steal it. This is the kind of gift that nobody will ever forget, for better or for worse. Its usefulness is overshadowed only by the shamelessness of its name and the absurdity of its marketing - true signs of a product with lasting power. In the context of a normal one-to-one gift giving scenario, you risk having it taken as an insult, but in a white elephant gift exchange, at the very least you’ll get a few laughs, and who knows? You might even open up a whole new world to some lucky soul in need.
The future of food is all about making weird shapes with your dinner. Or at least that’s what the modernist chefs will have you believe. And some of the things you can make with this molecular gastronomy kit are enough to make you feel like you’re eating with the Jetsons. Spheres, foams, and chocolate spaghetti are a few of the strange treasures that await inside this bizarre culinary kit.
Alright, enough pussyfooting around. Are you gonna open that damn bottle or not? This authentic 50 caliber shell will definitively end the standoff with any stubborn bottle cap, no matter how strong a fight it’s willing to put up. The Bottle Breacher is made by and supports veterans, and might pique the interest of an ex-military or historically-minded recipient. Using an actual bullet to crack open a well-deserved beer at the end of the day is surely a much nicer use for it than originally intended.
At a certain point, when you have too much stuff, more things just don’t do it for you anymore. At that point, if you’re smart, you start investing in superpowers. And trust us on this: every single man on the planet was a kid once, and every one of those kids wanted the power to see in the dark. To go where other humans cannot, to walk among the wild nocturnal animals as an equal, and to hide from their parents. They may not need to hide from their parents anymore, but that doesn’t make night vision any less awesome.
The old-fashioned wooden whiskey barrel has become a symbol of class and refinement. Big change from the old days when having one of these in your basement meant the feds might crash in any day and haul you off to prison for moonshining. There’s nothing like tasting the sweet fruit of your own labors, and these handmade barrels allow the owner to age spirits to their exact specifications. Now, even bottom-shelf bathtub whiskey can be turned into dusky gold in a few weeks time.
Like happiness, most peoples’ wealth is intangible. It’s just a number that represents a theoretical claim on a few bars of metal locked in a vault somewhere that don’t exist anyway. So what’s better than happiness and fake money? Gold! And nothing but gold! But you’re way too sophisticated to give them a shapeless ball of ore. Gold coins allow you to hand over timeless wealth in a package that’s fit to be displayed. Just like a king of yore.
Having to repeat yourself is such a bore. These comfortable foam sandals leave a clear message behind you, so you can give the command without opening your mouth. Trips to the beach will get a lot cheaper and easier now that your minions know exactly what to do.
Bacon is the official food of the month, every month of the year. Now somebody has gone a step further and made a delivery service with a special kind of bacon for every month. Every time we go a level deeper with bacon it just gets better. Rumor has it Elon Musk is working on a bacon replicating machine. It’s about time he did something useful.
The last thing they need is more stuff, and at the end of it all it’s really the experiences that they will cherish the most. Help them create some new memories to look back on by finding a fun activity to do locally. Be adventurous and choose something they’ve near done before. It’s a gift that will enrich their life and yours too.
Different people learn in different ways. Not respecting those differences is a major reason the public education system has failed us so terribly. Some people learn visually, some learn by mimicking, and some learn by beer. This book is for the last group.
Well, they’ve spent their entire life in this reality, they’ve probably had enough – we didn’t invent a whole new one for no reason. Give them a virtual reality headset and allow them to come face to face with dinosaurs, dance on the moon, meet their idol… you’ll probably never see them in the real world again.
Lottery tickets are a great gift you can pick up at your local convenience store, that come with a serious upside. If they win big you may get a piece of the action. Lottery tickets are often things that people won't buy for themselves, believing that they never win anything, but who could help but get their hopes up when you present them with a dozen chances to strike it rich and travel the world in a super yacht?
Nothing quite makes an impression like someone who has a giant tool and knows how to handle it. Get everybody within a half-mile radius drunk in one fell swoop with this absurdly proportioned mixology shaker. A brain-cell smiter of truly biblical proportions.
We are intelligent survivors by nature. Despite its ominous name, a worst case scenario can be a lot of fun, provided you have the tools available to pull a MacGyver-like exit. This little kit can save someone’s life over and over again. Check that, only their primal genius can save their life. But this lends a helping hand.
In an ideal world, every home would have its own draft beer on tap. If that’s a gift you can afford, then by all means, please get them a draft beer tap. For the rest of us, there is the next best thing. This beer dispenser uses sound waves and pressure to transform any canned or bottled beer into beer you would swear came fresh from the tap.
mBerry tablets are a natural product derived from berries that temporarily alter your perception of taste by binding to your taste buds and tricking your brain. It’s a pretty crazy experience and would make a memorable gift that they’ll be telling stories about for years. The tablets make sour and bitter things taste sweet. You can chow down on a lemon and swear it tastes like an orange. Vinegar tastes like apple juice. Hot sauce and spicy foods become sugary and beer tastes like Kool-aid.
Do you know someone who’s always in search of the perfect hot sauce? Well, maybe the answer is to let them make their own. This kit allows you to experiment with different pepper, spice, and vinegar combinations until you find the holy grail of hotness. No more excuses, just hot pepper perfection.
The last thing anyone wants to do after a long day is wrack their brains trying to figure out what to drown their sorrows with. That’s really the last straw. With this beautiful, handcrafted set of drunk dice, the possibilities are endless—and so are the regrets. But hey, a party isn’t complete until things get a little dicey..
So much of golf is a guessing game. They have to estimate the wind, take calculated risks to avoid water and sand hazards, and pace their beer consumption appropriately. A laser range finder at least takes club choice out of the equation. It’s also waterproof, which is great for those times when they feel like hurling it into a creek in a fit of rage. Armed with tools like these, it’s only a matter of time before they take the pro tour by storm.
Sturdier, more convenient, and easier to handle than traditional kabob skewers. No more forgetting to buy skewers and having to eat raw steak and vegetables or cook with their bare hands. Not every brilliant solution has to be high tech. Some just make a lot of damn sense.
High quality craft beer deserves a vessel made to the same exacting standards. Leave the pitchers for the Bud Light. An insulated, pressurized micro keg is the best way to dispense a fancy brew when taste and freshness really matter. The perfect gift for parties, casual gatherings, or personal consumption.
What better way to say that the pen is mightier than the sword? This knight pen holder will be their most loyal servant in all of their clerical crusades. Whether they’re battling with the bookkeeping or feuding with their filing, help will be at hand. And yes, their grocery lists deserve the royal treatment too.
These are the sorts of mishaps that you would expect to find in a Salvador Dali landscape - bullets, shark teeth, poker chips, starfish, and other assorted items lodging themselves in the sides of fully-formed drinking glasses. These glasses are the perfect way to help fill out a surrealist’s bar cabinets and unique way to tell someone that life is about to get very weird.
Keeping practical supplies in the car in case of emergency is something we all should do – yet many people out there on the road haven't added so much as a band-aid to their car’s inventory. That’s right, in the event of a blizzard, those store receipts and empty fast food bags won’t save you. Shocking, we know. This Auto Survival Kit on the other hand…
Help someone get away and recharge in a faraway place where nobody knows them and they can act however they want with virtually no longstanding social repercussions. Because when things get tough, evacuation is usually the only solution.
Literature and booze have long been intertwined in an unholy alliance of sorts, but this book-shaped flask container takes that tradition and makes it into a real-life, physical metaphor. And unlike most metaphors, this one can help you get drunk on the sly. What looks like an innocuous, nondescript book - the kind filled up with words and ideas and whatnot - is nothing but a devious ploy to camouflage a secret stash of the old firewater. Oh, the devilry they’ll get away with now.
Written by James Bond himself (or, you know, an actual real-life spy), this eye-opening book is packed full of genuine, practical tips for self-protection, and is a great present for any loved one or friend. Guaranteed to come in handy during a kidnapping, mugging or zombie apocalypse, you might just save their life one day.
Make sure that they’re never caught short (of battery, at least) with this pocket-sized power pack that is perfect for their portable devices. This charger harnesses the power of the biggest battery in our solar system so they should never have an excuse for not returning your call.
This gift gives them actual ownership of a tiny piece of a real Scottish castle, which gives them the legal right to call themselves a Laird or Lady. It’s a perfect boost to their ego, instant bragging rights, and endless opportunities to make them try a Scottish accent. When you add next year’s gift of a kilt to the mix, the transformation will be complete.
Everyone likes a nice stiff after-dinner drink, but sometimes you get tired of swearing at strangers and getting in fights with the sheriff. What’s a country boy to do? A great gift for anyone who’s looking to tone it down a notch but can’t give up the taste of that sweet Kentucky nectar. Or anyone who wants an extra special kick to start the day.
People love venturing into nature for the near mystical experience of being connected with our pre-civilized roots. We feel a strong, implacable pull toward wild places like the desert and the forest. The problem is, nature really just wants to eat you. This book tells you how not to let that happen.
If they’re anything like us, they’re not wild about some anonymous person manhandling their pork. The problem is, of course, that someone has to turn it into bacon. A make your own bacon kit is the perfect gift for someone who really wants to take control of their lives, starting with the most important parts.
Lobsters have many, many great qualities, not least among them are their nutritional and flavor profiles. But they’re dumb as dirt, exceptionally slow, and don’t drive. So if it’s inconvenient for you to go all the way to the ocean to find the best lobsters, you’re going to have to get someone to mail them to you. Thankfully, lobster mail is now a reality.
Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, or maybe just gives you PTSD. Either way, it’s better than dead. Here’s a book that can help the owner avoid the dead category for a little longer, even when things get hairy. Rough world we live in.
We’re not sure how far the constitution goes as far as ring marks on tables are concerned, but if you know someone who’s passionate about defending their household surfaces then you might just hit a bullseye with this present. This set of heavy duty coasters are as much a conversation starter as they are a conservation effort so we’d definitely take a shot on them if we were you.
The necktie is the unsung, often mistreated hero of the sartorial world. While shirts, pants, and jackets all get their own specialized travel bags to keep them clean, dry, and unwrinkled, neckties just get folded up and stuffed in the suitcase. But there is a price to be paid for this kind of disregard — and that price is a cranky, crinkly, abused-looking necktie that makes even the most dapper man look like he has been reduced to a stowaway sleeping in his work clothes in the undercarriage of a Greyhound bus. The necktie travel case is here to rescue that man’s dignity.
When you’re trying to figure out the most efficient way to do something, it always pays to look to nature first. And what more efficient shredders of animal flesh can you find than the majestic wild bear? Those legendary feral mauling machines were the inspiration for these expertly crafted meat shredding hand extensions. Durable, super sharp, and comfortable enough to forget they’re even there, the original Bear Paw meat shredders will revolutionize any cook’s bbq life.
The John Wayne Handy Book for Men is far more than the name would indicate. This is no simple “handyman’s book,” nor should it be when it bears the name of history’s most famous tele-cowboy. This goes far beyond simple skills like repairing household items. Legend has it that all J.W. had to do was glare at a broken piece of machinery, and it fixed itself. No, this book holds the secrets to the more esoteric arts of the male repertoire, like building a fire, talking to ladyfolk, and raising children that aren’t a blight on society. Don’t let them ride off into the sunset without it.
There’s an old saying that goes, “Nobody wants to see how the sausage is made.” Well, beer isn’t sausage, though they do go very well together. And everyone wants to see how the beer is made. Brewery tours exist to prove that beer, despite all appearances, is not in fact a magical substance. It’s created by ordinary people with ordinary people hands and no magic wands or other supernatural interference. It’s just a bunch of natural processes that happen to be exceptionally awesome. Take a beer enthusiast behind the scenes to witness the (non)magic in person with this local brewery finder.
As you’re probably aware, life has the ability to present far more than 100 unique deadly situations. However, for anyone looking to become death-proof, these 100 skills are the perfect place to start. This Navy SEAL penned survival guide offers up the most essential tricks and techniques to foil the grim reaper and his various earthly minions wherever and however they may haunt the reader. From battle-tested death maneuvers to everyday survival and evasion strategies, this book has what it takes to take any average Joe or Jane from “dead meat” to Badass Street.
It’s an underappreciated fact of the animal kingdom that all of its members can be made into jerky. Except maybe insects and jellyfish. And Sasquatch — but that’s only because you’ll never catch him. Everything else is fair game for the jerky racket. And once you’ve tried Buffalo Bob’s full array of exotic jerky offerings, you’ll understand that jerkyhood is perhaps the highest state that animals can achieve — like a sort of physical enlightenment. But delicious.