So many of your household appliances would be better if they weren’t fixed in place. Wouldn’t you sometimes like to bake in the backyard? Do the laundry on your roof deck? And what about the toilet? Wouldn’t you like to…well, never mind. For now, we’ve got the inflatable hot tub. Move it, deflate and store it, set it back up and inflate it in three minutes whenever it’s needed.
Despite what you might think, not all communication in the 21st century is digital. There is a midway point between old time mouth-based talking and facebook, where people still communicate in a low tech environment. You just have to make a game out of it, or no one will bother. Let wall scrabble be the glue that holds the thin shards of someone’s family life together.
In case you haven’t noticed, Mother Nature could use some help. Old plants and leaves will eventually rot enough that you can use them as mulch, but Jesus does it take a long time, and nobody’s got all day to wait. Like they say, if you want something done right, do it yourself. An electric leaf mulcher is a great way to speed up that slow old woman’s work.
Run, run as fast as you can, but you can’t escape from a Ninjabread Man. These stealthy holiday assassins will sneak, chop, and stab their way from oven to belly without making a sound. Turn any kitchen into a dojo with these hilarious novelty cookie cutters.
These may be the perfect joke gift for a vegan. But carnivorous animal lovers (never mind the apparent contradiction) will get off on these too. A cleaner, far more adorable way to eat corn on the cob.
Being earthbound can be such a drag. A Star Trek themed bathrobe can be a nightly reminder that mere humans just like us have indeed sailed among the stars, and perhaps someday we will too. Does wonders for your confidence too: once you’ve had the feeling of piloting an interstellar craft, running a household is child’s play.
In the world of minor annoyances that slowly wear you down, wet hand and footwear are right up there with highway noise and wet toilet paper. Thankfully, there’s no more need to wait two days for dry boots or gloves. Just pop them on this handy little machine, turn the heat up, wait an hour or two, and it’s go time.
The old video games have a charm that just won’t ever be matched again. A couple of ethnic caricatures running around in the clouds killing turtles and invading medieval castles? Nowadays all we’ve got are zombies, which are disgusting and weird and move too slow to be interesting. Hark back to simpler times with this novel housewarming gift.