How to Swear Around the World
It can be really frustrating when you’re away on an overseas business trip, soaking up the culture but not being able to order a drink at a bar or buy, well, anything at all really. At least with this handy book they’ll be able to air their frustrations in the local lingo and hopefully alert someone to their need for a helping hand…if they haven’t offended them first.
For the ultimate clock watcher, this stylish desk accessory is a fantastic way for your co-worker to count down the minutes left at work, hours left in the day, days left in the year, and years left before the sweet release of retirement, and that new life in the Bahamas.Or days spent pottering around the local garden center and shouting indignantly at daytime television.
Hear ye, Hear ye! Guess who just got promoted…to King Arthur’s Knighted Workers of the Round Table! With Excalibur by their side, they’ll rule the office, command respect at staff meetings and restore order to their cubicle. This is a once-in-a-lifetime chance to grasp greatness. Will they accept the challenge?
Do you have a friend or coworker who still consults a magic eight ball for important decisions? Well, it’s time for them to grow up. Everyone knows the real wisdom lies in magnets. The sleek design of this modern divining tool is sure to get attention for its looks as well as its results. Give the gift of infallible prediction.
Transport your co-workers to a tropical land where soft sand cushions their overworked feet and salty air tickles their senses. Feel the warm breeze caress the cheek and listen to the gentle waves lapping along the shoreline. Achieve calmness, serenity and purpose inside the confines of the office cubicle. Frolic in the sand and let the stress of work float away. Life really is a beach!
In a world where deadlines are king, why not focus on a finish line that’s really worth celebrating? Retirement! They'll keep their eye on the prize with this optimistic ticker that will drive them to accomplish bigger and better things at work. Imagine the sweet silence of no alarm in the wee hours of the morning. Retirement will feel like it’s always right around the corner, and if that doesn’t get them through the day, I’m not sure what else would!
This horse is an Internet sensation… because you can’t look at this and not laugh. If anyone in your office is into birds, squirrels, or laughing, this is the gift for them. Just look at it. Plus, it’ll keep the critters from hogging the bird feeder. Neigh!
Technically speaking, this is a rubber stamp, but colloquially speaking, using it is the opposite of rubber stamping. It allows the owner to send useless, insulting, and otherwise subpar documents back where they came from with the appropriate level of contempt. Slamming this thing face first into each page in a stack of shitty documents may be the highlight of your coworker’s day.
Be that guy. Use these time-tested techniques to appear smarter in meetings - without even trying! Topics include “how to nod and pace” and “what to do with your face.” This fabulously snarky book is sure to appeal to those who are familiar with the corporate drudgery of relentless, inane meetings.