Roll Up Keyboard
At first glance, you might think this is how Salvador Dalí would have typed if he had lived to see the modern laptop. But this is something even the great surrealist never would have dreamed up. This soft silicone keyboard rolls into an ultra compact, portable size, so it’s a perfect gift for people who are on the go.
Are you changing jobs soon and want to leave behind a legacy of disorder and cascading revenge? Give this book to the person at the office you hate least and let them unleash a reign of terror and annoyance. A perfect bridge burner.
Technically speaking, this is a rubber stamp, but colloquially speaking, using it is the opposite of rubber stamping. It allows the owner to send useless, insulting, and otherwise subpar documents back where they came from with the appropriate level of contempt. Slamming this thing face first into each page in a stack of shitty documents may be the highlight of your coworker’s day.
Aggression sometimes gets a bad name, but the truth is that it’s only dangerous if misdirected. Many things in life should be aggressively pursued, such as happiness, growth, meaning, contribution — all of the warm and fuzzy stuff you see on posters. However, some people also feel the impulse to aggressively pursue verbal confrontation, or worse, opportunities to punch other people’s faces. For these folks, alternative avenues of release are really helpful. Here’s an opportunity to bring one of these alternative avenues to the most stressful environment of all: the workplace.
Like the commissioned public statues of old, the most revered among us are now immortalized in bobblehead form. In fact, being commemorated with a bobblehead is one of the highest honors that a modern man or woman can aspire to. Surely you know someone who is worthy of such a gift, whose contributions to society and their fellow travelers makes this an appropriate gesture of respect and admiration. Go ahead, place them among the great figures of history. They’ve earned it.
Anybody who’s not wholly and purely evil would love the gift of fresh, on-demand ice cream at their desk, but here’s a ProTip: save this one for someone whose office isn’t too far away from yours. Just saying.
Do you have a friend or coworker who still consults a magic eight ball for important decisions? Well, it’s time for them to grow up. Everyone knows the real wisdom lies in magnets. The sleek design of this modern divining tool is sure to get attention for its looks as well as its results. Give the gift of infallible prediction.
Some people say social media has degraded human communication. Why stop at the digital realm? This pair of self-inking Like/Dislike Stamps is perfect for your non-communicative coworker who thinks in status updates.
You might call your toes “little piggies,” but the truth is that feet are the real workhorses of the human body. And we tend to be pretty merciless toward them for long stretches of the day, so it’s a nice gesture to show them some love when it’s all over with. And healthy feet make a happy human, so you could try giving a foot hammock to the most unlikeable person you know and see if it brightens them up a bit. Or better yet, give it to someone you like. Trust us, they’ll appreciate it.