Under Bed Personal Safe
Now that the internet has taken the place of “those magazines”, your college student should have plenty of room under the bed for this compact, sturdy rolling safe. Help them protect their valuables from that drunken, morally-challenged stranger they’ll be sharing an intimate space with. And their roommates.
The market is saturated with college grads, and they’re going to need a backup plan. That plan is, and always has been, gold! While they’ve been drinking Keystone Light and playing X-Box (or worse, writing math problems and studying business plans), the smart folks have been in the hills filling up their pockets with precious metals. And having a blast doing it.
The perfect portable self-defense device/sock-under-the-bed finder. If they had these in horror movies, everyone would still be alive. Compact and heavy-duty, this stun gun flashlight will fit right in their purse or sit comfortably on their nightstand for when their roommate sneaks in to steal their favorite shirt again.
Help reinforce good choices by giving a young person this hilarious version of the world’s most famous death game. Just load up a water balloon and pass the pistol around the table, then wait to see who gets soaked.
When you send your kids off to college, you try not to think about all the bad things that can happen on a given day with nobody responsible to look after them. Contusions, scrapes, broken bones, burns, gouges, dislocations, etc. Anyway, it’s not your problem anymore. Ship them off with a clean conscience.
Time to do some studying before you arrive on campus. Get some sage advice on how to avoid the most common pitfalls of college freshmanhood, from someone who’s been there and done that. They’ll sit back and laugh at their classmates as their lives unravel.
Studies show that short naps can significantly improve mental performance. Here is their very own plush, portable head enclosure, so no matter where they are, they can take a nap so peaceful they’ll be angry that they woke up. Angry and smart as hell.
Save your favorite college student the indignity of walking back and forth from the couch to the kitchen for a beer. We put a man on the moon for God’s sake. Hand-made by Amish craftsmen and built to last for generations, this is no flimsy Walmart furniture. Class out the wazoo.
They will make lots of friends in college, and some of them will be grimy as hell. Their roommates’ friends will be even worse. And their roommates will possibly be worse still. This handheld vacuum not only leaves everything it touches spotless, it eliminates most of the things you don’t want to catch while sitting on the couch or walking across the bathroom floor.