3D printing technology is all the rage these days, but has anyone been able to explain to you what the point of it all really is? Well wonder no more! The point, as is so often the case with hi-tech gadgets, is pancakes. Design and print pancakes in shapes never thought possible before. What a time to be alive and hungry for breakfast.
This is meant to be a one-stop home control unit for pretty much your whole life, and comes startlingly close. Messaging, news, weather, music, light switch operation, and more. A lot more. And no, you don’t need to own a motorcycle and sidecar or play ping-pong with Alec Baldwin to use it.
Sure, we lived for hundreds of thousands of years without electricity, but that’s not the point. The next time they’re in the middle of baking a casserole and a squirrel falls in the wires at the power plant, don’t make them resort to eating lettuce and raw cookie dough for dinner. Every house needs one of these.
Any new homeowner will have a lot of empty walls to fill. You could buy them a print, if you’re sure about their tastes, but why not buy them 20,000 works of art instead? This digital art museum can match any decor and can even display uploaded original art or photos.
Offering to vacuum your friend’s house every day would be an insane (and insanely good) housewarming present that nobody would ever give. And yet, if you think about it, that’s exactly what giving them a robot vacuum amounts to. Give the gift of clean floors every day with this amazing invention.
Remember when the rich family on the block had a riding lawnmower? This thing makes them look like the Flintstones. A robot lawnmower is the ultimate set-it-and-forget-it landscaping device. Way smarter than any lawnmower you ever expected to see. Thankfully, they had the foresight not to give these things arms, in order to avoid a Terminator situation.
You could buy them a 17 man band that could live in the corner of their den and serenade them every day, or you could just go with this unique piece of furniture that can play 17 instruments at once. Plus this pneumatically controlled Hootenanny can remember how to play 13,000 songs.
Quadruple size your triple word score with this enormous Scrabble board. Your wordiest, nerdiest friend will love letting passing strangers see them crush all opposition through their front windows as they walk by on the sidewalk in front of their new home.
What could be better for serving drinks at the round table than a knight in shining armor packed full of liquor? This full suit of Gothic plate armor makes your home a castle while also defending guests and homeowners alike from the ravages of thirst. Sword not included.
One day soon, artificial intelligence is going to be a reality, and the machines are going to take everything. Until then, you might as well get as much out of these bastards as you can. Here’s a robot who will make fully-customizable drinks until he knows better.
Help the new homeowner reminisce about a time when TV shows were a true escape from the harsh realities of the world and puppetry was a respected art form — when beautifully composed songs about the simple joys of life occupied the limelight and imaginative play was sweet and original. This heartwarming timepiece will bring comfort throughout the day and return silliness to an all-too-serious era. Lighten up and smile, the Muppets are alive and well and life isn’t so bad after all!
There’s a great future in plastics. And now, anyone with a 3D printer can have a hand in shaping that future. They can program anything they’d like, start up the printer, and watch it come to life right in front of their eyes. Creation on a level to anger the gods.
A major problem with modern houses is the lack of surprises. A hidden door adds a sense of mystery and danger, two things sorely lacking from so many people’s lives. What they do with the hidden room is their own business…
Brewing beer sounds fun, but ask anyone who’s tried it and they’ll tell you that it takes a lot of boring cleaning and babysitting of the brew to do it right. Add to that the difficulty of getting consistent, reproducible results, and it just makes sense to let this clever machine do the work. Watch the home brew progress from phone or tablet while taking it easy.
Internet shopping is convenient, but you have to deal with the anxiety of paying for something that’s not in your hands and then hoping it will both show up and still be there when you get home. With this handsome, scumbag-proof steel enclosure, they’ll be able to sleep soundly knowing they’re sure to receive their rightful goods.
Create 3D printer models out of real objects with a 3D scanner. This is invaluable practice for the future, when we’ll be able to print our own dream lives complete with real living friends, pets, and loved ones that act exactly as we’d like them to. Or perhaps not. But it’s fun to pretend.