Bag of Unicorn Farts
Who doesn’t need a little more magic in their life? Add in a dose of sugary sweet silliness and let the troubles of our earthly world just melt away. Whether you’re a believer or not, unicorns have a special way of inspiring happy thoughts dripping with toot-filled colorful rainbows and puffy cotton candy clouds. Crack open a whimsical bag of fairyland flatulence and lighten up even the dreariest of days.
Why not reward the passive-aggressive person in your life with a playful beast that best personifies the light and dark sides of their personality? Raw emotional expression can be quite therapeutic and these cuddly critters are particularly gifted when it comes to delivering love and horror with just one forcible squeeze. Lifeless teddy bears are dreadfully dull and possibly creepier than these cheeky creatures. This badass gift is sure to raise the shock factor at the next occasion!
We have long maintained that the only reason people think eating bugs is gross is because society is uptight about it. They taste fine! They are eco-friendly! The have lots of protein! Birds eat them, right? You think you’re better than a bird? You can’t even fly! Try them, we triple dog dare ya!
Perfect for lazy Sunday mornings on the bridge, these Original Show style bathrobes come in gold, blue, or red, and feature an embroidered insignia above the left breast and rank stripes on the arms. Drink coffee and explore the quadrant in these 100% cotton or microfleece ultra-casual uniforms.
Relieving yourself into an empty beer can might seem like a bright idea, but it doesn’t quite make the grade at the country club golf course. For all those chaps who can’t seem to get that coveted hole-in-one, this discreet port-a-potty is the next best thing. That handy-dandy golf towel wasn’t just made for polishing the five irons … talk about the perfect-sized curtain for answering the call of nature. Don’t let a full bladder spoil your eagle on the 9th hole. Drain that lizard in style and tee up like a true gentleman!
Looking for some quality literature for those extended trips to the potty? Hands (and pants) down, this go-to guide to number two etiquette in the workplace should be part of performance evaluations and new hire orientations. A whole new concept for on-the-job training, this handy briefcase buddy is the perfect gag gift that’s guaranteed to relieve some of the pressure we all feel at work. When duty calls … will you be prepared?
The lucky recipient of these handy hi-tech gloves will be dressed to impress at any outdoor excursion or special ops affair. The ultimate in wireless fashion accessories, these snug-fitting paw protectors will keep your pal connected at all times and make them the envy of every screen-hungry mobile phone junkie from San Francisco to Dubai. Even 007 will be begging to get his hands on these ultra cool mobility mitts. Those hands were made for talking!
The recipient of this whimsical gift doesn’t have to be into taxidermy per se, just lonely enough to need a host of rodent performance artists for companions. These furry friends won’t leave droppings around the house like those other mischievous crumb-tracking critters already inhabiting the home. A class above the rest, this quirky cast of players will provide endless entertainment and quiet company, far outperforming other domesticated pet breeds. And the Emmy goes to…
Learn why playing Russian roulette is a bad idea the safe way with this hilarious gag toy set. Just fill a balloon with water (or blood, whatever), secure it inside the ring, put it next to your head, and pull the trigger. A little pin may or may not pop the balloon. And nobody gets hurt.