The internet is nothing if not a big money making machine. Put that machine in the service of buying something you would never pony up for yourself. We promise you’ll still get most of the credit.
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We all like to think we’re larger than life, but in truth we’re really just branches on the grand tree of our ancestry. Screw that, most of us are just leaves at best. Some of us are maybe just a little speck of caterpillar vomit on one of those leaves (you know who you are). Your family tree doesn’t have to be that detailed though.
Some things get better with age and some would argue that relationships are one of them. One thing that definitely gets better though, is a fine whiskey. What better way to marry up two things that get better with time than with a personalized whiskey barrel? It’s a gift that they’ll no doubt appreciate if they need a stiff drink at the thought of all those years behind them…or all those years ahead!
Everyone pretends to think those giant-headed drawings of people doing exaggerated things are silly, but give a framed one of themselves to your parents and watch. That thing’s gonna go on display for sure.
The refrigerator provides an ideal canvas for artistic, decorative, and sentimental displays of all kinds. Yet most people just have an old grocery list or a bunch of alphabet magnets strewn across its surface haphazardly. Wouldn’t it be nicer if they could look at the front of the refrigerator and see the smiling faces of their most beloved family members gazing back at them? Make it happen with a fridge collage magnet.
Nothing says “I love you” better than the ultimate aged bottle of liquor! Celebrate the enormous accomplishment of surviving decades together and toast to the years of bliss that lie ahead. Who needs another pearl necklace? A tie clip? Forget about it! Set this trophy atop the mantle and revel in success.
A lot has changed since they walked down the aisle all those years ago, including how photos have become less of a keepsake now that we can so easily take them with our phones. A photobook will capture the chapters that came after the wedding album, and it’s sure to become a treasured keepsake that never runs low on batteries.
Flowers are a lovely gift but for an anniversary, we’re not sure how they’d feel about something that will inevitably wilt and die. So, for fans of the floral, surprise them with this crystal rose which will be in bloom forever, much like their love for one another, even after all these years.
Yes, your parents love your cooking, but they’d kind of like to get out for once. But if you buy them a restaurant gift card, you’re still sort of force feeding them. You should really stop that. An Open Table gift card lets them decide what to stuff in their own faces while gazing lovingly into each other’s eyes and reminiscing about a life shared. Or bickering over who ruined the kids. Or arguing over when the roof was replaced. You know how it is.
Technology may be shockingly smart these days, but unfortunately your computer is still too dumb to stand up when you do. Though on that note, when it does become smart enough to stand up with you, you should probably run. On second thought, once the machines are that smart it’s already too late. Just sit back down and wait for the computer to tell you what to do next. If you don’t make any abrupt movements, it might spare you. In the meantime, buy this adjustable standing desk for someone you care about so they don’t ruin their posture.
The dual computer screen is one of today’s uber-nerd status symbols. Let the investment bankers have their Rolls Royces and the pimps their gold plated canes. The pinnacle of luxury living for a gamer is a super high resolution dual screen, so they can engage in some next level merkage (gamer slang). But it’s not just for video game junkies. Plenty of professionals have sworn off the single screen setup for good, pledging their allegiance to the gods of multi-tasking.
They say change always starts with the person in the mirror. But when you look into this mirror, you actually see two people. There’s you, and then there’s someone else in way better shape who’s trying to get you to do things you might not really feel like doing. And that’s not just any old fit person who’s goading you on — it’s an elite personal trainer from a top gym. So you better listen. This is the perfect workout gift for someone who needs that little bit of extrinsic motivation, but is narcissistic enough to kind of like staring at themselves while they work out. So, pretty much everybody.
A virtual cooking class with Gordon Ramsay is a chance to learn from a culinary master without the yelling and food punching you've seen on TV. His MasterClass lessons feature the seven-star Michelin chef in his home kitchen teaching everything from kitchen setup, buying ingredients, prepping, plating, and pairing restaurant quality recipes that wow guests. Crispy duck with red endive and spinach anyone?
Sleep Pod is a first-of-its-kind sleep solution designed around the science of Deep Touch Pressure Therapy that can help you fall asleep faster, and stay asleep longer. Sleep Pod applies a gentle, calming pressure to your entire body, much like a hug. This helps to reduce anxiety and gets you ready for sleep.
In classier quarters this might be called a “decanter.” But the built-in stupidity of a decanter is that it’s really just a big glass you’re not allowed to drink out of. You see, in the genteel world of wine, “classy” consists of adding unnecessary steps to what should be a simple process. Of course, bourgeois society has attached all kinds of stigma to drinking straight from the bottle, so some kind of compromise is necessary. And that compromise is right here.
Phones actually have more germs on them than a typical public restroom. This smart cleansing machine might not eliminate the dirty content sucking up the data on their phone, but it will be sure to return sterile swiping to their wired existence. Personal device hygiene should not be overlooked by today’s touch-screen fanatics. A high-tech disinfectant, this ingenuous accessory will decontaminate wireless communication and restore cleanliness to the digital age. Oh, and it also charges while it cleans!
So many of your household appliances would be better if they weren’t fixed in place. Wouldn’t you sometimes like to bake in the backyard? Do the laundry on your roof deck? And what about the toilet? Wouldn’t you like to…well, never mind. For now, we’ve got the inflatable hot tub. Move it, deflate and store it, set it back up and inflate it in three minutes whenever it’s needed.
