Custom Valentine’s Fortune Cookies
Shaking the 8-ball might suffice when you’re fifteen, but mature folks like yourselves need a soothsayer with a tad more wisdom under their belt. Mark this Valentine’s day with a bagful of prophetic goodies that will reveal some delightful predictions and quirky forecasts of your future together. Deliciously convincing, these classic fortune tellers will add a crunchy sprinkle of fun and uncertainty to the occasion!
Marimos are little fluffy balls of aquatic moss native to Japan (because of course they are) that you can keep as a pet. They can live a long time if properly cared for - like 100 years - and in rare cases grow in the shape of a heart. The rare Valentine's Day gift that can outlive both of you.
Couples that have been together a while have a tendency to let themselves go a bit. Why fight it? Behold the undisputed King of the Gummy Bears. Give your sweetheart this 5 pound calorific treat and watch as they slowly devour him, one body part at a time, in a kind of perverse, reverse Build-A-Bear scenario.
You know what you love about them, but be honest - without a few prompts you would have a hard time remembering on the spot. Thanks to the geniuses behind this fill-in-the-blank devotional book, you can say everything you want without having to be Shakespeare. In all honesty, half of the work is done for you, but you still get to do the important half as well as take all the credit. It’s sort of like Mad Libs, but with love instead of ridicule.
If you’re considering going with gift as common as flowers, you might consider stepping it up a few dozen notches by dipping them in 24k gold. Just gather up all your extra gold, melt it in your crucible, and toss in your plants. Or just buy this Eternity Rose instead. Actually, it’s probably electro-plated not really dipped in molten metal, but you get the point.
Just as the sun rises and sets with each passing day, so too does your heart beat continuously for the love of your life. Mark the hours, days and years that frame out the eternal bond between you and your partner with this enduring timepiece. Ponder your everlasting connection with a timeless symbol that will anchor your relationship for years to come and add meaning and soul to your outdoor space.
You know that your romantic history is of epic significance. If only you had the hardware to prove it. Now you can immortalize your love story in the form of a big, fat, campy adventure romance novel. The world always has a gross shortage of heroes, and if somebody has to fill the void, it might as well be you. Here is your chance to fill it with style and sexiness. Enter yourself in the great pantheon of timeless erotic literature, where you’ve always known you belong.
Extend the celebration of your love for weeks, months even, with these personalized devotion vouchers. Your soul mate will revel in the chance to squeeze as much attention out of you as they possibly can—they might even try to double or triple their bounty if the rules allow for it—and you can earn extended reward points for being such a generous partner. Send your sweetheart on a shopping spree through the romance department where expiration dates never apply!
Giving the gift of roses on Valentine's Day is pretty traditional, but since roses just wilt and die shortly after they’re received, they’re really not a good symbol for ever-lasting and growing love. These beautifully preserved roses will never wilt and require no care or water. What better way to express your eternal adoration for the love of your life?