It would probably be underwhelming if you just gave someone a few pieces of fruit as a thank you present. But cut the fruit into shapes, skewer them on some sticks, and arrange them to look like a bouquet of flowers? Now that’s a thank you gift!
Who knew this was a thing? Say thanks by giving someone an investment portfolio! Pick a stock and a dollar amount, and they get a fractional amount of stock equivalent to what you spent that they can keep or trade or sell for cash as they wish.
If you decide to do this, go all out. Show up at 5 in the morning dressed impeccably in a tuxedo. Proceed to handle all unpleasantness with quiet grace, never faltering, never betraying any emotion save unswerving loyalty to the person whom it your your honor to serve. Take care of them the way that they think they deserve. Really buttle them good.
Lobsters have many, many great qualities, not least among them are their nutritional and flavor profiles. But they’re dumb as dirt, exceptionally slow, and don’t drive. So if it’s inconvenient for you to go all the way to the ocean to find the best lobsters, you’re going to have to get someone to mail them to you. Thankfully, lobster mail is now a reality.
In our crazy modern world, who has the patience to wait more than a day for their online purchases, or to watch one episode a week of their favorite series, instead of a 10-hour binge? If they don’t already have a subscription to Amazon Prime, it’s your duty to bring them out of the dark ages. It’s a gift that keeps on giving, and you can get it for them right now. They’ll get free shipping on tons of great stuff from Amazon as well as access to a bizillion movies for free. Whatever their addiction, they can feed it on Amazon. Help them feed it faster and better.
When someone has done something good for you, it’s time to show your gratitude. But you’re a tough guy (or gal), and you just can’t seem to choke the words out. It’s like trying to swallow tree bark. Here’s a nice, sweet way to let someone know you appreciate whatever it is they did.
If you’re indebted to someone the best way to pay them back is with money. That’s pretty obvious. But giving cash feels a little impersonal, like you just bought their help. Turn that cash into a money bouquet, and now you’ve got a work of art, which they’ll feel better about accepting. At some point in the future they will pull it apart and spend the cash. Which is what you wanted in the first place.
Show your appreciation by buying them a couple tickets to a cool event, show, or concert. Get two tickets so they can take their significant other or a friend. Don’t be weird and try to get them to let you have the second ticket with some not-so-subtle strategy. This is not your gift.