Personalized Fart Extinguisher

When someone drops a bomb with your name on it, the best thing you can do is light a candle with theirs on it. Not to pray for their soul, mind you, but to cleanse the shared airways. And since it’s always best to fight heavy artillery with heavy artillery, you don’t want to settle for any old candle. You want a high quality hand-poured candle with a scent that’s strong enough to fight off that of your antagonist. The perfect gift for anyone who lives with a documented intestinal terrorist.