What day does the milk expire? Who the hell knows the answer to a question like that off the top of their head? Actually, your refrigerator does, if you’ve got one of these. Interior cameras allow you to monitor food levels from your phone, and you can receive instant messages when the door is left open so you know which kid to beat. Just kidding. Don’t do that.
The August Smart Lock Pro attaches right to your existing deadbolt to give you the ability to monitor and control your lock from anywhere in the world. Quell (or fuel) your paranoia with a real-time activity feed sent directly to your smartphone. Integrates easily with your existing smart home setup, and works directly with Amazon’s Alexa.
All the same colors and shades of white as the Philips Hue, but without the need for a hub. With a few of these bulbs, you can put that old swingers pad you had in the ‘70s to shame. But really, you should probably leave those days behind you. On second thought, no. Time to get it on.
Nobody wants to be forced to act responsibly at a barbecue. That defeats the purpose. Yet the grilltender holds everyone’s happiness hostage to his attention span. After five or six beers that doesn’t work so well. This wireless grill thermometer will send an alert to your phone that the steak you’re ignoring is ready for your mouth.
Every new parent rests easier with a good baby monitor. Being able to check in by picking up your phone and pulling up an instant video feed is the ultimate in parental comfort. Whether you’re worried that you sleep too soundly to hear your new arrival crying (in which case, oh boy, you’re in for a surprise) or you’ve just seen The Omen too many times, this will surely put your mind at ease.
Once upon a time, speakers were for music. Back then, if you were talking to your speaker, everyone knew you were off your medicine. Well, here’s a company that still thinks like your grandpa: they believe that a speaker that doesn’t sound good is just a waste of space, no matter who lives inside it. This one is made to rock the house, and it comes equipped with Amazon’s Alexa to give it some serious brains to boot.
No, those cold spots in the living room aren’t from evil spirits. Your thermostat just sucks. This one will optimize your heating and cooling in the rooms that matter most, and you’ll stop draining your bank account trying to get rid of Dracula’s ghost. A win-win.
Lawn work is a thankless chore. Here is an expert mower that will never demand recognition, appreciation, or financial compensation. Just goes about its business with a level of dedication and consistency that are hard to find in the modern world. A real throwback.
The Apple HomePod is a powerful smart home control center capable of running a wide array of household toys. It’s the perfect smart speaker for Apple addicts, since it uses Siri as its virtual assistant and naturally plays well with all of your other Apple devices. If MTV ever brings back Celebrity Deathmatch, we’re hoping for a Siri vs Alexa fight to settle this one for good.
Technology may be shockingly smart these days, but unfortunately your computer is still too dumb to stand up when you do. Though on that note, when it does become smart enough to stand up with you, you should probably run. On second thought, once the machines are that smart it’s already too late. Just sit back down and wait for the computer to tell you what to do next. If you don’t make any abrupt movements, it might spare you. In the meantime, buy this adjustable standing desk for someone you care about so they don’t ruin their posture.
The dual computer screen is one of today’s uber-nerd status symbols. Let the investment bankers have their Rolls Royces and the pimps their gold plated canes. The pinnacle of luxury living for a gamer is a super high resolution dual screen, so they can engage in some next level merkage (gamer slang). But it’s not just for video game junkies. Plenty of professionals have sworn off the single screen setup for good, pledging their allegiance to the gods of multi-tasking.
They say change always starts with the person in the mirror. But when you look into this mirror, you actually see two people. There’s you, and then there’s someone else in way better shape who’s trying to get you to do things you might not really feel like doing. And that’s not just any old fit person who’s goading you on — it’s an elite personal trainer from a top gym. So you better listen. This is the perfect workout gift for someone who needs that little bit of extrinsic motivation, but is narcissistic enough to kind of like staring at themselves while they work out. So, pretty much everybody.
A virtual cooking class with Gordon Ramsay is a chance to learn from a culinary master without the yelling and food punching you've seen on TV. His MasterClass lessons feature the seven-star Michelin chef in his home kitchen teaching everything from kitchen setup, buying ingredients, prepping, plating, and pairing restaurant quality recipes that wow guests. Crispy duck with red endive and spinach anyone?
Sleep Pod is a first-of-its-kind sleep solution designed around the science of Deep Touch Pressure Therapy that can help you fall asleep faster, and stay asleep longer. Sleep Pod applies a gentle, calming pressure to your entire body, much like a hug. This helps to reduce anxiety and gets you ready for sleep.
In classier quarters this might be called a “decanter.” But the built-in stupidity of a decanter is that it’s really just a big glass you’re not allowed to drink out of. You see, in the genteel world of wine, “classy” consists of adding unnecessary steps to what should be a simple process. Of course, bourgeois society has attached all kinds of stigma to drinking straight from the bottle, so some kind of compromise is necessary. And that compromise is right here.
Phones actually have more germs on them than a typical public restroom. This smart cleansing machine might not eliminate the dirty content sucking up the data on their phone, but it will be sure to return sterile swiping to their wired existence. Personal device hygiene should not be overlooked by today’s touch-screen fanatics. A high-tech disinfectant, this ingenuous accessory will decontaminate wireless communication and restore cleanliness to the digital age. Oh, and it also charges while it cleans!
So many of your household appliances would be better if they weren’t fixed in place. Wouldn’t you sometimes like to bake in the backyard? Do the laundry on your roof deck? And what about the toilet? Wouldn’t you like to…well, never mind. For now, we’ve got the inflatable hot tub. Move it, deflate and store it, set it back up and inflate it in three minutes whenever it’s needed.
