Follow Me Bring Beer Flip Flops
Having to repeat yourself is such a bore. These comfortable foam sandals leave a clear message behind you, so you can give the command without opening your mouth. Trips to the beach will get a lot cheaper and easier now that your minions know exactly what to do.
We have long maintained that the only reason people think eating bugs is gross is because society is uptight about it. They taste fine! They are eco-friendly! The have lots of protein! Birds eat them, right? You think you’re better than a bird? You can’t even fly! Try them, we triple dog dare ya!
The recipient of this whimsical gift doesn’t have to be into taxidermy per se, just lonely enough to need a host of rodent performance artists for companions. These furry friends won’t leave droppings around the house like those other mischievous crumb-tracking critters already inhabiting the home. A class above the rest, this quirky cast of players will provide endless entertainment and quiet company, far outperforming other domesticated pet breeds. And the Emmy goes to…
For the musician who hates music, or for the kid whose parents you hate, there is the Otamatone, a “musical” instrument that makes the bagpipes seem reasonable. A touch sensitive bar on the neck changes pitch, while the little mouth at the bottom “sings” when squeezed. It all makes perfect sense (in Japan).
For the nuke-obsessed friend who’s searching for a tad more naturally occurring radiation in their life, this handy rock will make them feel like they’ve got some atomic ammo in their pocket. This harmless dose of unenriched uranium may not impress Kim Jong-un, but it’s sure to fire up some good old fashioned chit chat about the periodic table and perhaps even educate a few clueless heads about Earth’s metals. A great gag gift for the Cold War fanatic in your life, this powerful element packs a punch!
The lucky recipient of these handy hi-tech gloves will be dressed to impress at any outdoor excursion or special ops affair. The ultimate in wireless fashion accessories, these snug-fitting paw protectors will keep your pal connected at all times and make them the envy of every screen-hungry mobile phone junkie from San Francisco to Dubai. Even 007 will be begging to get his hands on these ultra cool mobility mitts. Those hands were made for talking!
This made-to-order voodoo doll is the perfect gift for your most vengeful friend. Just send in an image of who you want the doll to resemble, and the magic happens as your friend pushes pins into the doll’s most sensitive areas. Just be sure it doesn't look anything like you.
Perfect for lazy Sunday mornings on the bridge, these Original Show style bathrobes come in gold, blue, or red, and feature an embroidered insignia above the left breast and rank stripes on the arms. Drink coffee and explore the quadrant in these 100% cotton or microfleece ultra-casual uniforms.
This is not your grandfather’s Kit Cat Clock, but it is, ironically the size of a grandfather clock. The modern classic gets a big size upgrade, but the iconic smile, rolling eyes, and swinging tail are all still here. You’re going to love this giant kitty.