Bring Me Chocolate Socks
Some people talk with their hands, and everyone finds this very annoying and distracting. These socks allow the wearer to talk with their feet, all from the universally non-threatening reclined position. And best of all, unlike when your uncle Giuseppe gets excited, nobody has to worry about losing an eye.
This may sound like a recklessly bold claim, but we have the studies to prove it. We took all the blankets in the world and rubbed them up against a very soft person, then listened to how much they cried. This one elicited a mere whisper.
This is the perfect choice for their bedside reading lamp - a light bulb that actually promotes sleep. Typical bulbs emit a specific type of blue light that suppresses melatonin, but that wavelength of color is filtered out of this bulb that is used by NASA to help astronauts sleep in space.
The cool thing about giving an Edible Arrangement as a get well soon gift is that even if they are not feeling up to eating much, it is happy to just sit there looking pretty. It’s like giving flowers that visiting well wishers can snack on. And it’s even healthy to boot!
In reality this translates to, “I’m a hopeless klutz, but nobody thinks I’m important enough to throw someone else down the stairs in my place,” but that would probably take up both sides of the shirt. And part of being a good friend involves making people proud of their shortcomings. This get well gift kind of makes them feel like a badass for busting their sh*t.
One of the worst things about being sick is laying there thinking about all the things that are not getting done while you are unable to do them. Ease some of the worry by rolling up the ol’ sleeves and doing some much needed chores. Let them concentrate on getting better instead of cutting the grass.
We all have the urge to make chicken soup for a sick loved one, but that’s hard to do if you live hundreds or thousands of miles away. Enter the Spoonful of Comfort. They will deliver a basket containing gourmet soup, bread, cookies, a personalized note, and even a ladle. It’s the next best thing to doing yourself.
There are a small but important set of emergencies that can only be rectified with a clown nose. This has been demonstrated time and time again in hospitals rooms across the world. Sadly, there’s no money in clown noses, so big pharma keeps us in the dark.
They say laughter is the best medicine, and Netflix is crammed full of comedies to help someone in recovery get well faster. But if they would rather watch torture movies and slasher films with people getting disemboweled and whatnot, they’ve got that too. Whatever makes them feel better.