Give the gift of fat stacks of cash with this genuine bundle or real fake US currency. This prop money looks good enough to fool even the most discerning filmgoer, and makes a fun gift for a retiree who is about to discover life on a fixed income.
Give the gift of beauty with a piece of original artwork from Artsy. These are not prints. This is the real thing, suitable for mature adults with refined tastes, like a retired person is supposed to have. Of course, some of the stuff here maybe isn’t all that refined, but at least it is original.
It can be dicey to rely on your 401k or social security check these days. Better fortify them right off the bat with a little old fashioned green paper money. It may not grow on trees, but you sure as hell can put it there yourself. They’re not going to give a damn, as long as they’re the ones doing the pickin’.
This is the old people version of buying them their own pool cue. Like every game of chance, bingo is ruled by the secret and unfathomable rubric of superstition. Using a borrowed dauber is like spitting in the face of the lottery gods. Not a good idea.
Turn a retirement party into a college drinking game with Never Have I Ever. Find out everything they didn’t have time to do while working all those years, and get hammered while doing it. Hangovers aren’t half as bad when there’s no work to go to in the morning.
Whatever colors they wore in their younger, more spry years, you can bet they wore them with pride. But god knows they’re not going to fit into that uniform anymore. And even if they did manage to force their old carcass into those youthful dimensions, it would probably only make everyone a little worried for their mental health. But turn it into an everyday use item like a tote bag, and they’ll look stylish as all get-out.
Here are two things we know about old retired men: 1) They like to play golf. 2) They have to pee a lot more often than younger folk. The golf club urinal solves the second thing so they can focus on the first. It even comes with a towel so nobody gets arrested.
What a way to walk off into the sunset! These fashionable flip-flops allow the new retiree to leave a trail of words like breadcrumbs down the beach beckoning one and all to follow along and bring some suds to share.
The ice treatment isn’t just for dead people anymore. Besides, we think gifts for dead people are creepy - that’s why you won’t find a “gifts for dead people” category on this site. But it turns out that freezing living people is really good for them, boosting immunity, alleviating aches and pains, and so on. The coolest retirement gift you’ll ever find.