If they’re the type that’s always scribbling notes, then they’re the type that has a pile of them forgotten on their desk. Help get things organized with this bluetooth pen that saves a digital copy of everything they write.
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Nothing says you’ve made it like clothing that bears the logo of your corporate brand. And no, we’re not talking about those cheesy screen printed t-shirts that somebody in HR’s cousin whipped up for that convention last year. We’re talking about real, legit looking professional branded wearable merchandise (PBWM, if you require an acronym). Such accessories are no longer the exclusive domain of uber-hip brands like Supreme. Now your boss can corporatize their bling too and let the whole world know what they need to know, in case they don’t already.
Your boss always demands that you get better at your job, so why not demand the same of your boss? In a subtle, pat-on-the-back, “keep up the good work, tiger” sort of way. Bring out the best in them by showing them how the best do it.
The necktie is the unsung, often mistreated hero of the sartorial world. While shirts, pants, and jackets all get their own specialized travel bags to keep them clean, dry, and unwrinkled, neckties just get folded up and stuffed in the suitcase. But there is a price to be paid for this kind of disregard — and that price is a cranky, crinkly, abused-looking necktie that makes even the most dapper man look like he has been reduced to a stowaway sleeping in his work clothes in the undercarriage of a Greyhound bus. The necktie travel case is here to rescue that man’s dignity.
Tyrannical behavior is never good, but with some people it just seems to be ingrained in their DNA. If you have to suffer through it, at least make your boss admit it with every sip of double spiced pumpkin chai, or whatever that bastard drinks. Call it passive aggressive if you will. We just call it effective. Since you probably can’t knock your boss down a couple of rungs on the corporate ladder, you might as well ridicule them a little.
There’s no better way to spend your last few minutes before bedtime than reading about someone who’s smarter, more successful, and far more innovative than yourself. Inspiration, they call it. Give your boss the gift of understanding what they don’t understand.
It’s tough to find a gift for your boss that they’ll actually use. Rather than throwing your money away on some doodad that they’ll pretend to like and feel obligated to display, why not put your money to good use instead? Make a donation in their name to a cause that is dear to them. It’s a classy gift that actually makes the world a better place, plus it’s tax deductible!
If your boss is a kid at heart or is the type that needs to work out some pent up emotions, and if you’re lucky enough to have this in your area, take them to Extreme Sandbox and let them play with construction equipment. Actually they’ll be doing anything but construction in this massive adult sandbox. This place lets you smash cars!
If m&ms were a person, you would have choked the crap out of them by now because all they do is say the same thing over and over again. Thankfully, we now live in the infinitely customizable iCulture, where you don’t have to put up with that kind of nonsense anymore. Say everything you ever wanted to say, in the sweetest way possible.
There are few things that will enrage a high-level cook more than preparing all of the ingredients for a 5-star meal, only to find that the cilantro, parsley, or basil has degraded into a brown, slimy mess. More than a few unsolved murders have likely resulted. And what’s worse, some of that rotten herbage probably gets tossed into the recipe anyway, and some of that food probably gets served to you. Are you starting to see why you should buy one of these for your friends and family?
Technology may be shockingly smart these days, but unfortunately your computer is still too dumb to stand up when you do. Though on that note, when it does become smart enough to stand up with you, you should probably run. On second thought, once the machines are that smart it’s already too late. Just sit back down and wait for the computer to tell you what to do next. If you don’t make any abrupt movements, it might spare you. In the meantime, buy this adjustable standing desk for someone you care about so they don’t ruin their posture.
The dual computer screen is one of today’s uber-nerd status symbols. Let the investment bankers have their Rolls Royces and the pimps their gold plated canes. The pinnacle of luxury living for a gamer is a super high resolution dual screen, so they can engage in some next level merkage (gamer slang). But it’s not just for video game junkies. Plenty of professionals have sworn off the single screen setup for good, pledging their allegiance to the gods of multi-tasking.
They say change always starts with the person in the mirror. But when you look into this mirror, you actually see two people. There’s you, and then there’s someone else in way better shape who’s trying to get you to do things you might not really feel like doing. And that’s not just any old fit person who’s goading you on — it’s an elite personal trainer from a top gym. So you better listen. This is the perfect workout gift for someone who needs that little bit of extrinsic motivation, but is narcissistic enough to kind of like staring at themselves while they work out. So, pretty much everybody.
One of the biggest problems with being in public is there are so many things you’re either required or tempted to touch. Door handles, ATM touchscreens, animals, garbage…the list is practically endless. And it’s all contaminated with a never-ending litany of biological hazards and impurities. Germs, chemicals, and various bodily fluids are liberally smeared upon all the surfaces of our civilization. This keychain multitool is the gift from the gods of hygiene we’ve all been waiting for.
A virtual cooking class with Gordon Ramsay is a chance to learn from a culinary master without the yelling and food punching you've seen on TV. His MasterClass lessons feature the seven-star Michelin chef in his home kitchen teaching everything from kitchen setup, buying ingredients, prepping, plating, and pairing restaurant quality recipes that wow guests. Crispy duck with red endive and spinach anyone?
In classier quarters this might be called a “decanter.” But the built-in stupidity of a decanter is that it’s really just a big glass you’re not allowed to drink out of. You see, in the genteel world of wine, “classy” consists of adding unnecessary steps to what should be a simple process. Of course, bourgeois society has attached all kinds of stigma to drinking straight from the bottle, so some kind of compromise is necessary. And that compromise is right here.
Phones actually have more germs on them than a typical public restroom. This smart cleansing machine might not eliminate the dirty content sucking up the data on their phone, but it will be sure to return sterile swiping to their wired existence. Personal device hygiene should not be overlooked by today’s touch-screen fanatics. A high-tech disinfectant, this ingenuous accessory will decontaminate wireless communication and restore cleanliness to the digital age. Oh, and it also charges while it cleans!
