Digital Pen Saves What You Write
If they’re the type that’s always scribbling notes, then they’re the type that has a pile of them forgotten on their desk. Help get things organized with this bluetooth pen that saves a digital copy of everything they write.
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If m&ms were a person, you would have choked the crap out of them by now because all they do is say the same thing over and over again. Thankfully, we now live in the infinitely customizable iCulture, where you don’t have to put up with that kind of nonsense anymore. Say everything you ever wanted to say to your boss, in the sweetest way possible.
Order some custom fortune cookies with little pearls of business wisdom inside. Or use the custom messages to help persuade your boss into doing something - “Don’t forget to lead by example” or maybe “Extra vacation days are proven to boost productivity”.
Tyrannical behavior is never good, but with some people it just seems to be ingrained in their DNA. If you have to suffer through it, at least make your boss admit it with every sip of double spiced pumpkin chai, or whatever that bastard drinks. Call it passive aggressive if you will. We just call it effective. Since you probably can’t knock your boss down a couple of rungs on the corporate ladder, you might as well ridicule them a little.
Lobsters have many, many great qualities, not least among them are their nutritional and flavor profiles. But they’re dumb as dirt, exceptionally slow, and don’t drive. So if it’s inconvenient for your boss to go all the way to the ocean to find the best lobsters, you’re going to have to get creative. Thankfully, lobster mail is now a reality.
For the distinguished gentleman who enjoys the finer things, but also eats a poppy seed bagel every morning and always has some stuck in his teeth, there are scotch infused toothpicks. The added flavor and kick of scotch will encourage use, which is something that everyone can smile about.
It’s tough to find a gift for your boss that they’ll actually use. Rather than throwing your money away on some doodad that they’ll pretend to like and feel obligated to display, why not put your money to good use instead? Make a donation in their name to a cause that is dear to them. It’s a classy gift that actually makes the world a better place, plus it’s tax deductible!
Your boss always demands that you get better at your job, so why not demand the same of your boss? In a subtle, pat-on-the-back, “keep up the good work, tiger” sort of way. Bring out the best in them by showing them how the best do it.
Kissing butt and making coffee is no longer enough to make it to the top. With desperate millennials flooding the marketplace, ready to do whatever it takes in order to move out of their parents’ basements, the stakes are higher than ever. But don’t give up just yet. The problem simply requires a little more directness. Use the psychological principle of consistency to get into your boss’ good graces. Once they put this shirt on, they’ll feel compelled to act as if it’s true. Victory is yours.