These candles are formulated to smell like your home state. Good thing nobody told them that when you’re home all you really smell is burned turkey and your brother-in-law’s beer farts. This is more like the idealized version of your home smell, the kind of false memory someone wants to take with them when they leave.
If they’re moving from one region of the country to another, half of their wardrobe may become pretty useless. Those tank tops and swimsuits were perfect for Florida weather, but not so much for Wisconsin. Get them some new threads that will be more appropriate for their new environment so they’ll be a little less like a fish out of water.
This sounds more like a gift for you than for them, but it’s something that they will appreciate in a big way. They will probably be feeling a little isolated and lonely in their new town, especially if they’re leaving deep roots behind. It takes a long time to cultivate friendships in a new community, so seeing a familiar face in their new town is likely to make it feel more like home. Plus, you could probably use a vacation, right?
So they finally got that dream house in the dream neighborhood and everything is right in the world. Congratulations to them. But how are they going to get that thousand-pound antique grandfather clock into the moving truck? Oh, isn’t that convenient: they thought you were going to carry it. Hand them this instead and give them your best “Well, what are you waiting for?” look.
The worst part about moving to a new town is often the actual moving. Since relocating is typically pretty expensive, some people elect to do all their moving themselves in order to save a few bucks. You can offer a helping hand, or rather several helping hands, by hiring professional movers. They do all the heavy lifting, loading and unloading, and can even do the packing and unpacking if you want. It’s a pretty huge going away gift, but it’s one they will truly appreciate in such a stressful time.
Many people, when faced with new surroundings, forget to eat and end up perishing from malnourishment. This is a leading cause of death among travelers and those who have recently moved. A gift card at a great restaurant not only reminds them of the paramount importance of calorie ingestion, but even pays for some of it.
Each city has its own stories, food, entertainment, landmarks, and vengeful spirits. Help them settle in by experiencing these things firsthand under the guidance of an informed expert. No matter how far away their new home may be, they’ll be a grizzled and knowledgeable old local by night’s end.
If they’re relocating to a big city, navigating the public transportation system can be challenging at first, especially if they’re moving from Podunk where they took their car everywhere. Help them get where they need to go like a real local with a prepaid subway or bus pass.
When people move away they always say they’ll come back soon for a visit. But weeks stretch into months, and into years, and they don’t show. To be fair, it may not be practical or affordable for them. You can help them cross one excuse off their list by covering the airfare home.
Technology may be shockingly smart these days, but unfortunately your computer is still too dumb to stand up when you do. Though on that note, when it does become smart enough to stand up with you, you should probably run. On second thought, once the machines are that smart it’s already too late. Just sit back down and wait for the computer to tell you what to do next. If you don’t make any abrupt movements, it might spare you. In the meantime, buy this adjustable standing desk for someone you care about so they don’t ruin their posture.
The dual computer screen is one of today’s uber-nerd status symbols. Let the investment bankers have their Rolls Royces and the pimps their gold plated canes. The pinnacle of luxury living for a gamer is a super high resolution dual screen, so they can engage in some next level merkage (gamer slang). But it’s not just for video game junkies. Plenty of professionals have sworn off the single screen setup for good, pledging their allegiance to the gods of multi-tasking.
They say change always starts with the person in the mirror. But when you look into this mirror, you actually see two people. There’s you, and then there’s someone else in way better shape who’s trying to get you to do things you might not really feel like doing. And that’s not just any old fit person who’s goading you on — it’s an elite personal trainer from a top gym. So you better listen. This is the perfect workout gift for someone who needs that little bit of extrinsic motivation, but is narcissistic enough to kind of like staring at themselves while they work out. So, pretty much everybody.
A virtual cooking class with Gordon Ramsay is a chance to learn from a culinary master without the yelling and food punching you've seen on TV. His MasterClass lessons feature the seven-star Michelin chef in his home kitchen teaching everything from kitchen setup, buying ingredients, prepping, plating, and pairing restaurant quality recipes that wow guests. Crispy duck with red endive and spinach anyone?
Sleep Pod is a first-of-its-kind sleep solution designed around the science of Deep Touch Pressure Therapy that can help you fall asleep faster, and stay asleep longer. Sleep Pod applies a gentle, calming pressure to your entire body, much like a hug. This helps to reduce anxiety and gets you ready for sleep.
In classier quarters this might be called a “decanter.” But the built-in stupidity of a decanter is that it’s really just a big glass you’re not allowed to drink out of. You see, in the genteel world of wine, “classy” consists of adding unnecessary steps to what should be a simple process. Of course, bourgeois society has attached all kinds of stigma to drinking straight from the bottle, so some kind of compromise is necessary. And that compromise is right here.
Phones actually have more germs on them than a typical public restroom. This smart cleansing machine might not eliminate the dirty content sucking up the data on their phone, but it will be sure to return sterile swiping to their wired existence. Personal device hygiene should not be overlooked by today’s touch-screen fanatics. A high-tech disinfectant, this ingenuous accessory will decontaminate wireless communication and restore cleanliness to the digital age. Oh, and it also charges while it cleans!
So many of your household appliances would be better if they weren’t fixed in place. Wouldn’t you sometimes like to bake in the backyard? Do the laundry on your roof deck? And what about the toilet? Wouldn’t you like to…well, never mind. For now, we’ve got the inflatable hot tub. Move it, deflate and store it, set it back up and inflate it in three minutes whenever it’s needed.
