How Your House Works
Houses are great, but they don’t run themselves. There’s a million and one ways to ruin your property value, break important stuff, and blow yourself up. Don’t let someone you care about go blindly into that death trap.
These may be the perfect joke gift for a vegan. But carnivorous animal lovers (never mind the apparent contradiction) will get off on these too. A cleaner, far more adorable way to eat corn on the cob.
The old video games have a charm that just won’t ever be matched again. A couple of ethnic caricatures running around in the clouds killing turtles and invading medieval castles? Nowadays all we’ve got are zombies, which are disgusting and weird and move too slow to be interesting. Hark back to simpler times with this novel housewarming gift.
Run, run as fast as you can, but you can’t escape from a Ninjabread Man. These stealthy holiday assassins will sneak, chop, and stab their way from oven to belly without making a sound. Turn any kitchen into a dojo with these hilarious novelty cookie cutters.
Everyday life and art don’t have to exist in segregation. Anyone who appreciates a little surrealism in their day will go to pieces when they see this image distorting mirror that dissolves into puzzle-like sections. Because purely functional rooms are boring.
Despite what you might think, not all communication in the 21st century is digital. There is a midway point between old time mouth-based talking and facebook, where people still communicate in a low tech environment. You just have to make a game out of it, or no one will bother. Let wall scrabble be the glue that holds the thin shards of someone’s family life together.
Life is often times very frustrating. It’s easy to eat a thousand pistachios a minute, but you end up with a mountain of inedible shells and a weird feeling in your mouth. The second problem is your own fault, but someone went and fixed the first one because they care about you and hate seeing you struggle. Pass on the gift to someone else you care about.
Eggs are delicious, healthy, delicate, and frustrating all at the same time. This makes them a perfect candidate for something to hand to a machine and say, “Here, you deal with this.” And unlike housemates, the machine won’t feel used or unappreciated. It will just produce perfect eggs in one of several forms, all without protesting. Another win for technology.
Being earthbound can be such a drag. A Star Trek themed bathrobe can be a nightly reminder that mere humans just like us have indeed sailed among the stars, and perhaps someday we will too. Does wonders for your confidence too: once you’ve had the feeling of piloting an interstellar craft, running a household is child’s play.