Sure, they can make water more exciting, but why stop there? What not sparkle some juices? Coffee? What happens you sparkle already sparkling water? Can you carbonate already carbonated drinks? We don’t know, but now’s the chance to find out! The drinks — and dreadful discoveries — are limitless.
Anyone who receives this gift is sure to be good at half of what this book’s about—just not the winning part. Use their birthday as a chance to tease them and help them at the same time. Be wary though: once they read this book, they might flip to judging your life choices at the same time.
Yes, eating toast with a picture of your face on it can be impressive and delicious, but eating someone else’s face on toast is menacing. Show the 30-year-old in your life you care by giving them a chance to frighten their friends. And their enemies. Especially their enemies.
You care about this person and you want them to discover knew things…that and the fact they’ll eventually have to drink something questionable at best thanks to these dice. That’s right; drink whiskey with that weird-looking liqueur and a lemon. Oh, you don’t have cherry bitters? Guess you’ll just have to drink that tequila straight up. The possibilities are endless—and so are the regrets.
Nothing says you care about a person like fueling their caffeine addiction. Wish the 30-year-old in your life happy birthday by making them jittery for the day—and many days to follow. They’ll thank you for it—about a billion times before crashing.
Everyone likes getting money for a present, so why not give it in one of the cutest, but most inconvenient ways possible? If they’re questionable about maintaining hygiene, that’ll never be the case again. Wait until rent is due, and then enjoy how lovely they smell as they wash their hands or shower obsessively to get the cash.
If someone has reached the age of thirty without realizing the joy of luxuriating in a hot bath while drinking a glass of cold white wine, buy this gift for them. If they have reached that age and know exactly how nice it is to do that, then, again, buy this gift for them! It works either way.
Some 30-year-olds have children and this is a perfect gift to…oh, who are we kidding? This one’s for you and the 30-year-old just as much as their children because nothing’s as satisfying as a nice, cold popsicle — except not having to share it.
Ah, fortune cookies: the perfect way to mess with the 30-year-old in your life. From ominous: “Beware of buses today” to vague: “You’ll have a day” to the outright teasing: “You should rethink that shirt”. Of course, you could always customize the messages to be nice…Ha! Who are we kidding, give them a bus phobia for their birthday.
Sushi’s great, but not as great as when launched from a cannon. Good news for you – and everyone else within ten feet – it doesn’t have a great deal of firepower, but still helps spice up meals with some unnecessary– scratch that, totally necessary action hero elements.
When they want a back rub from the spouse, the kids to clean their room, or their turn on the dishes passed along, it’s now at their fingertips. Give them the gift of abusing power. Just be careful though – if a coupon applies to you, write in the small print that restrictions apply, or you’ll get a real surprise on that “drive me anywhere” one at 2am.
When they hit 30, it’s the prime of their life. Time to start raking in achievements and accomplishing those goals they’ve always dreamed of. So it’s your job to get in the way of that. Bring their productivity to a screeching halt with a gift that’ll have them staring mindlessly for hours.
You care about your friend, which is why you want them to have a cooler with Bluetooth connectivity, an ice crusher, and…fine, you want to borrow this cooler every chance you get. It’s not like they can you refuse you — you’re the reason they have it in the first place.
For fending off a mugger, they’ll thank you. For fending off annoying dogs, children, co-workers, and sometimes even you – they’ll really thank you. While it’s a high price to pay, take comfort that it’s worth it for their protection. And for the film you’ll catch of them inevitably testing it on themselves.
Everyone needs a hobby, but why get them into something like scrapbooking or fishing, when you could kick-start a hobby that really pays off – for you. One that means free beer in the near future. Just brace your taste buds – the first attempts may make you wish it had more alcohol.
At 30 years old they probably don’t own an extensive art collection yet. But that doesn’t mean they don’t appreciate the finer things in life. This is the perfect opportunity to get their collection started with a portrait of you riding a horse with a rocket launcher.
And clearly your friend is one of those who shouldn’t. But friendship is about making moonshine in a bathtub and going blind for three hours – not following social constructs of “safety” and “health”. Plus you never know when you might need a friend to pick the lock on your front door.
If they didn’t have a germ phobia before, help them develop one before it’s too late. Once you explain how much this vacuum catches that was missed before, they’ll start to notice germs everywhere. Just realize you’ll be hanging out at their house from now on.
Help you friend pretend they’re in a fancy pizza restaurant as they throw the dough and use this stovetop artisanal pizzeria. Although they might get a little too into it; beware of fake accents and having to peel the thing off the ceiling.
Give the gift of beautiful views, bucket-list achievements, and especially if they’re afraid of heights, hours of entertainment for you. It veers away from cruel since it’s completely safe, but you’ll definitely get your money’s worth watching them rotate between admiring the splendor and clutching the basket while praying in four languages. Especially since they only speak one.
Sometimes, you need to get down to business and do your work, but other times, you need to procrastinate—help your friend do the latter. There’s a time and a place for efficiency and that’s not when you have a pen that can bend in your hands.
Take them on a walk down memory lane with a box full of toys they used to love, accessories they used to envy, and hairstyles they’d rather forget. Especially the hairstyles. Be sure to include those. And make them open the gift in front of all their friends and family.
This gift gives them actual ownership of a tiny piece of a real Scottish castle, which gives them the legal right to call themselves a Laird or Lady. It’s a perfect boost to their ego, instant bragging rights, and endless opportunities to make them try a Scottish accent. When you add next year’s gift of a kilt to the mix, the transformation will be complete.
Packed with protein, these all-natural snacks really put the gag in gag gift. If the 30 year old you know is always going on about what an adventurous eater they are, this is a perfect gift to finally put an end to that narrative.
If they like to get their Zen on, this automated sand drawing machine will add the perfect calming touch to their decor. They’ll be mesmerized for hours on end as their mind leaves their body to explore the Cosmos in perfect, balanced harmony.
This gift is worth it solely for the look on their face when they find out what it is—even if they don’t understand why it is. It’s best delivered deadpanned; no expression and definitely no explanation. Don’t worry, they’ll learn to love it—and if they don’t, all their Facebook friends will when you post that picture against their will.
Everyone likes receiving money, and it’s the easiest gift to give. Unfortunately, a pile of bills is often considered tacky. On the other hand, roll them up into flower shapes and it’s considered art. A brilliant ruse to make the simplest of transactions socially acceptable.
If they have a lot of empty walls to fill, you might consider getting them some artwork. You could buy them a print, if you’re sure about their tastes, but why not buy them 20,000 works of art instead? This digital art museum can match any decor and can even display uploaded original art or photos.
Support your local artisans by outfitting them in handcrafted elegance. Personalized and painstakingly beautiful, handmade pieces express affection, loyalty and soul that can’t be replicated. Celebrate their individuality and undeniable value with a one-of-a-kind creation that has been formed especially for them. A gift that will be prized for generations to come, this special gesture will win their heart.
DNA samples just got really elegant! So what if the Feds might be able to find them, at least they’ll have some killer artwork on their walls. The colorful, personalized and edgy draw of these masterpieces will stun guests and accentuate any décor. Portraits are so overrated. Leave a legacy trail that will be sure to amaze for generations to come.
It’s true – a bottle of their favorite wine will last a few hours, at best (and they may not even remember drinking it!), but the memory of that crazy day spent white water rafting or skydiving will last a lifetime – even if they did have their eyes closed and were screaming for most of it!
Every day can feel like their special day with this loving collection of personalized tributes. What’s better, they can re-read them as often as they'd like, tuck them under their pillowcase, add them to their lunch tote or even send them to themselves in the mail. They'll never tire of the praise and will probably feel inspired to reciprocate, so the love train can just keep chugging along!
What could be better for serving drinks at the round table than a knight in shining armor packed full of liquor? This full suit of Gothic plate armor makes their home a castle while also defending guests and homeowners alike from the ravages of thirst. Sword not included.
The most important innovation in motorized vehicles since the Model T, at least. This is just a car without all of the parts they don’t care about, at a tiny fraction of the cost. Let them live in style and let everyone know about it.
Nothing adds a bit of natural flair to an outdoor party better than a large piece of fruit that gets you drunk. Just hollow out a watermelon, insert the tap, and fill it up with your favorite beverage. Let them show off their inner DIY in the coolest way possible.
Take their breath away, without actually having to take your own breath away, by giving them a birthday souvenir they can keep forever. Man’s best friend is a perfect present for modern art enthusiasts, balloon animal buffs and dog lovers alike. He’ll never deflate, never pop and never bark too early in the morning
Treat them like royalty for one day only. Whether a lady of leisure or lord of the manor, they’ll appreciate the gesture of having the housework taken care of, dinner being served or even their drinks being delivered while they sit back and relax. And although it may not seem like the best way to spend your day, you can be thankful that they only have one birthday a year.
Flowers are always gratefully received but when you’re sending a gift for an occasion as important as a 40th birthday, you want something that will last a little longer. These earrings combine the beauty of a bouquet with a lasting memory of a milestone birthday. They match their birth month too so they can be worn as a subtle hint in case anyone forgets the recipients 31st.
Trying to find a gift for a gastronomy guru who’s got a taste for the unusual? We highly recommend Aromaforks if you’re looking for something that’s sure to go down like a treat. It will tantalize the taste buds of any thirty-year-old foodies you know and is a perfect addition to dinner parties to give them a bit of a twist.
If you’re looking for a 30th birthday gift that’s completely out of this world and will last a lifetime, this is it. And if they’re not over the moon that they get to possess their own little patch of the night sky, it may be worth reminding them of how young they are compared to their twinkling namesake.
Buy them a couple tickets to a great event or show as a little test. Will they give the extra ticket to you? You just gave them this very thoughtful gift, after all. Or do they keep them both. In which case, maybe they just get a box of chocolates from the drug store next time.
Scrabble often gets a hard rap as an ‘old-fashioned’ or ‘fuddy-duddy’ game, but your hip and trendy 30-year-old is about to change all that. 4D TV? Tropical aquarium? An original Picasso? No, it’s all about the giant vertical scrabble, that’s what all the cool kids want on their walls these days.
Appeal to the material side of fun and indulge your trend-setting 30 year old in some hedonistic, haute couture entertainment. So what if her closets are busting at the seams, there’s always room for that extra pair of designer jeans and some famous label dresses. Whip out that plastic and take pleasure in some serious swiping and tap-and-pay consumerism. Max out the fun factor and celebrate their birthday with some good ole fashioned excess!
We know what you’re thinking, they’ve made it this far, what else could they possibly need to know to get through life? This book is full of useful and useless little life hacks. A manual for the everyday and the not-so-everyday, making it a perfect reference guide for a 30-year-old looking to try something new or cross a few things off their bucket list
We all know draft beer tastes better, but for those horrifying situations when there’s only bottled on offer, save your recipient from a fate worse than death with this flavor-enhancing gift. It even adds gas (we’re sorry). Give this to them for their 30th birthday, and they’ll be happily hiccupping through delicious draft-like ale in no time.
For the alternative 30-year-old who’ll try anything once, why not pop them in a local isolation tank and deprive them of their senses for an hour or so, see what happens? It might make them feel super relaxed and chilled-out about getting a year older. Or, it might just make them feel lucky to be alive when you finally let them out!
Everyone wanted to be a spy at some point, so whether your 30-year-old is a budding Jason Bourne or a James Bond-to-be, why not get them started with a collection of spy secrets from a former CIA agent? Just as a side note, we are not responsible for any booby traps you fall foul of as a result of the recipient reading this book.
In their twenties, this probably wouldn’t have been a very exciting gift. ‘Gee whizz, thanks aunty Pam – some vegetables. You decided against the laptop then?’ But now, at 30, the chance to avoid the weekly grind of the grocery store, with people barging into them and huge lines at the checkout will likely seem like a gift from above.
Cyber bullies beware, there’s a new sheriff in town and they're armed and dangerous! Don’t let the birthday guy or gal fall prey to senseless crime. Arm them with some advanced protection that will give those identity hackers a run for their money. Keep their precious plastic safe and out of harm’s way so they can swipe to their heart’s delight on that next shopping spree
If you’re racking your brain trying to think of a perfect 30th birthday gift for someone who’s keen on a little outdoor cuisine, this should solve your birthday present brainteaser. As simple as it is, it’s a flippin’ genius invention that will take their barbeques to the next level and buying it will guarantee your invite to the next one.
We’ve all been there. Waking up with a terrible post-birthday hangover and all you can think about is donuts. But the idea of actually leaving to go buy some is frankly horrifying. With this sweet invention, though, there’s barely even a need to leave the bed.
You could buy them a 17 man band that could live in the corner of their den and serenade them every day, or you could just go with this unique piece of furniture that can play 17 instruments at once. Plus this pneumatically controlled Hootenanny can remember how to play 13,000 songs.
Do you know someone who’s always in search of the perfect hot sauce? Well, maybe the answer is to let them make their own. This kit allows you to experiment with different pepper, spice, and vinegar combinations until you find the holy grail of hotness. No more excuses, just hot pepper perfection.
Hey, you never know, you could be buying a gift for the next Wolf of Wall Street – they just haven't discovered their inner stockbroker yet! Help them in their Pursuit of Happiness by giving them this financial board game, and you might soon be starring in their autobiographical, rags-to-riches blockbuster. Now, who would play you…?
Sleeping in space is not as easy as one might think, which is why NASA invented this lightbulb that promotes melatonin production by taking the blue out of the spectrum of light it produces. Help your favorite 30 year-old get a proper night’s sleep with this scientifically proven gift.
There’s nothing sadder than a gardener without a garden. This vertical indoor planter is the perfect 30th birthday gift for someone whose green-fingers are itching to sow, tend and water, but who lives in an apartment block and just doesn’t have the outdoor space usually required. Now they can garden on their kitchen wall!
Help them learn more about the people around them than they could ever possibly want to know with the classic party game Never Have I Ever. The game is simple: each player takes turns drawing a card and reading the “Never have I ever…” statement out loud, answers truthfully, then hopes everyone is too drunk to remember what they said.
Invite them into their own little magical corner of the forest. Let their eyes get lost in this miraculous ecosystem and give them an escape from the toils of indoor gardening. Clean, inspiring, vibrant and enchanting, this miniature treasure will accent their decor and calm their busy mind. Rekindle that relationship with nature and explore the simple joys life can bring!
Admittedly, this is kind of a niche gift. But somehow, inexplicably, this has become a giant niche. Fans of the animated sitcom - as well as the associated blog, comic book, and soundtrack album - will have a great time geeking out to these real life, chef-tested recipes for the outlandishly-named burgers the show is famous for.
The perfect gift for your friend who struggles to leave their fluffy unicorn slippers at home in the morning- cough, um, did we say unicorn? We meant stylish sheepskin moccasins, obviously. Anyway, these cozy shoe liners will make them feel nice and warm and sleepy… oh no, Jeff’s fallen asleep at his desk again.
Having a cell phone is cool, but you know what’s cooler? Making a cell phone. Give them a gift that lets them sort of do that with the RePhone DIY Cell Phone kit. It’s not from scratch obviously, the kit contains all the parts, but anyone with the tech chops will be able to do some fun things with this.
The years seem to start to speed up by the time a person’s thirtieth birthday rolls around. Thirty years might not seem like so long. This framed reproduction of the New York Times front page from the day they were born will remind them that 30 years is actually a pretty long time ago.
The birthstone for the month of April is diamond. Other months have ruby, or emerald, or sapphire, and the list goes on. What we’re really talking about here is getting someone a very nice piece of jewelry. Don’t think you can cheap out just because it’s a birthstone.
One reason it can be hard to find the perfect gift for a 30th birthday is that people at that age already have plenty of stuff as it is. Nobody needs another trinket, right? A charity gift card let’s them give instead of getting, and is a far more meaningful gift than any other piece of plastic you could buy.
If you know someone who never stopped physically growing while also remaining a kid at heart, we’ve got the perfect 30th birthday present. They’ll be able to build things with their freakishly large and ever-expanding hands just like they used to do with regular Legos back when they were still normal sized.
We think the 30th birthday is about as young as we’d recommend for this gift. It looks like a magic wand, and operates pretty much like one, as an electric blue, 2,012° F arc erupts from the tip to light candles. Or light everything in the whole house playing wizard, if the younger kids get hold of it.
According to research, a woman spends an average of 76 days looking for items in her handbag during her lifetime, so we think she'll love this addition to her favorite accessory that will save her time finding keys, phones, and whatever else she squeezes into her satchel.
Don’t let mother nature’s inability to harness her own electrons cramp their style. Now they can stay connected even when far from civilization. Plus, this little gadget will make them the most popular person on the block when the zombie apocalypse comes.
By their 30th birthday, your friend or loved one may have already started to suspect something about the inherent absurd futility of life. If not, then perhaps you can inform them with this gift, which is an extraordinarily apt illustration of the horrifying predicament in which we the living find ourselves.
Go big or go home, wait, they can do both with these giant yard games! They’ll supersize the fun at backyard parties with these larger than life versions of the games we all played growing up. All sorts of giant games are available including checkers, chess, Connect Four, Yahtzee, Scrabble, Jenga and more.
Everyone hates doing the dishes. Anything you can do to ease that burden will be appreciated. Take glassware for example. With Loliware when you finish your drink there’s no need to take it to the dishwasher. You just eat it, or save it for a midnight snack.
Since the dawn of time, chaos, terror, and death have periodically rained down from the sky. Only the lucky were spared. But now we have weather radios, so you can go inside instead of dying. This one also conveniently charges your phone so the next hurricane doesn’t have to interrupt your game of angry birds.