If money’s no object and your recipient has a large hootenanny sized space in their house just waiting to be filled, look no further than this luxury musical gift. With a host of instruments and thousands of songs to choose from, your 50-year-old will be partying away every night! Note: their neighbors might not be quite so thrilled.
For the 50-year-old who’s always dragging you to sushi restaurants on your nights out, then casually spearing bits of rice and fish with chopsticks and speaking Japanese, this make-your-own sushi tool is the perfect 50th birthday gift. Now, they’ll be able to invite you over to their house to casually spear rice and fish and speak Japanese. At least you’ll save money.
For all the hardcore, dinosaur-loving 50-year-olds out there! (And we do mean, hardcore.) They’ll need to eat, sleep and breathe dinosaurs, as well as own at least a small mansion with a 15 x 40ft space for a Tyrannosaurus Rex. You’ll need to be a multi-millionaire, and prepared to splash some cash on hugely impressive, but ultimately useless gifts.
For 50 years, they’ve been mixing their own cocktails, the old-fashioned way. All that free-pouring. All that guesswork. The amount of times they’ve served a Cosmo that was too orangey, or a Mojito that was almost pure rum (ah, what a night that was!) Happily, technology can now control this part of our lives as well.
If they don’t know how to do these things by now, chances are they’re too embarrassed to ask. How to change a tire? How to make scrambled eggs? How can any self-respecting 50-year-old ask these questions and not be mocked? Give them this book on the sly, and you could save them from their hidden shame.
Everyone loves pizza, which means you literally can’t go wrong with this culinary gift! Well, we mean, in an ideal world, they probably would have preferred a trip to Italy, to stroll along the Amalfi Coast, bathing in Mediterranean sunshine and stopping at a traditional pizzeria for their 50th birthday meal, but hey – we do what we can.
Make them feel like they’re dining out in a posh restaurant every night with the gift of this giant peppermill. If you’re feeling really generous, you could even be their waiter for the evening, as a special 50th birthday treat - ‘More pepper, sir? Fine or coarse?’
You’ll have to explain to them that this is the modern-day equivalent of feeding up your carrier pigeon to make him speedier… ok, maybe not. But on a serious note, this is the kind of practical gift that anyone living in the 21st Century (and in sunny climes) is sure to appreciate, including your 50-year-old.
Have the last few dinner parties hosted by your 50-year-old been a bit, well, lackluster? It’s time to take charge and change this forever by giving them the awesome gift of a fondue maker! They’ll feel obliged to use it when you visit, and how could a pot of communal melted cheese or chocolate not improve any social situation?
Kombucha is the ancient art of making tea into something half the people who try it will love and the other half will vomit back onto your carpet. The people who love it are objectively correct, because it makes you live forever (almost). Anyone who has fallen head over heels for it will do the same for you if you buy them this homebrew kit.
For the practical 50-year-old, who likes to be well-prepared in case of emergencies like hurricanes, tsunamis or running out of battery and not being able to FaceTime their friends, this emergency charger and radio is a no-brainer. They’ll be able to safely Snapchat their way through the next natural disaster / zombie apocalypse, all thanks to you.
Grilling doesn’t have to be a seasonal pastime anymore. This creative addition to your barbeque repertoire will bring the oven to the patio and some deliciously baked goods to the chef’s outdoor menu. The irresistible flavor of brick-oven fare will redefine your backyard and inject some home-cooked aroma into the too often smoky, greasy smells of the charcoal circuit. Who knew cooking out could be so refined?
If they’re anything like us, they’re not wild about some anonymous person manhandling their pork. The problem is, of course, that someone has to turn it into bacon. A make your own bacon kit is the perfect gift for someone who really wants to take control of their lives, starting with the most important parts.
Just what they need to get rid of 50 years of grime on their prized jewels (ok, their wedding ring), this hi-tech jewelry cleaner will ensure their wrists and neck sparkle for years to come. Plus, it can also be used to clean dentures and eyeglasses – which let’s face it, will probably come in handy soon!
A real conversation starter, this unique 50th birthday gift is made by and supports veterans, and might pique the interest of an ex-military or historically-minded recipient. Now, they can use an actual bullet to crack open a well-deserved beer at the end of the day. Which, surely, is a much better use for it than originally intended.
Different people learn in different ways. Not respecting those differences is a major reason the public education system has failed us so terribly. Some people learn visually, some learn by mimicking, and some learn by beer. This book is for the last group.
They might have survived for 50 years on a diet of macaroni cheese, mashed potato and McDonalds, but now it’s time to spice up their cooking (literally) with this artisan, culinary gift. They’ll soon be getting hot and sweaty in the kitchen - just be wary about accepting food from them anytime soon.
After 50 years of boring normal water, it’s about time they got something to make it more exciting, and everybody likes fizz, right? Jacuzzis, champagne, lava lamps… bubbles make people happy, and that’s what you want in a 50th birthday gift.
Sunflowers are some of nature’s most obnoxiously beautiful creations, and they make a real statement when planted in your yard. Bright yellow and absurdly tall, they grab the attention of every passerby. Almost like standing on the porch and yelling at people, but in a really endearing and pleasant way.
At some point during their forties, it becomes acceptable for people to use a small stick to pick out bits of food in their teeth, and leave them lying around. We know, it’s gross. But chances are, your 50-year-old does it. You might as well make it nicer for them with these Scotch infused versions.
Lobsters have many, many great qualities, not least among them are their nutritional and flavor profiles. But they’re dumb as dirt, exceptionally slow, and don’t drive. So if it’s inconvenient for you to go all the way to the ocean to find the best lobsters, you’re going to have to get someone to mail them to you. Thankfully, lobster mail is now a reality.
Who has time for trial and error? Folks today demand fast-acting, proven solutions to their everyday conundrums. A modern stand-in for the tried and trusted Farmer’s Almanac, this back pocket companion is more reliable than your great-grandmother and more concise than an open-ended Google search. Believe it or not, some of the “smartest” solutions have been around for ages.
This shiny balloon dog eliminates the sadness of both the traditional party balloon that is destined to pop, and the real-life canine companion that rarely outlives a human (whoa – sorry). This man’s best friend will stay by their side from their fiftieth birthday to their last (if it doesn’t end up in a yard sale before that!)
‘Yes, it really does go back that far – who knew!’, you’ll quip as you hand over this personalized gift (they’ll be creasing up, we’re sure). The perfect gift for the reflective 50-year-old who likes to quote ominously, ‘Back in my day…’, this will give them a whole new source of ways to finish that sentence.
If there’s anything that can make wine taste better, it’s a little frustration. If you think life in our rapid-delivery consumer culture is just a bit too easy, then teach someone a valuable lesson on their 50th birthday, by making them work more than they anticipated for their reward. You’re not only giving the world’s oldest artisan beverage, you’re helping develop life skills.
Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, or maybe just gives you PTSD. Either way, it’s better than dead. Here’s a book that can help the owner avoid the dead category for a little longer, even when things get hairy. Rough world we live in.
By their 50th birthday, they’ve probably managed to acquire some decent jewelry. Maybe not a lot, but some, and good enough that they want to keep it clean and nice. So instead of giving them another gold bracelet, perhaps this Jewelry Steam Cleaner would be a prudent gift.
Never let your 50-year-old run out of gas again! With this practical gift, your recipient can monitor the propane level in their canister, and know exactly when they need to buy more. It could prove particularly helpful now they’re getting older – chances are they’ve got other kinds of gas to worry about…
Sitting on the throne, for lack of a better term, isn’t the place where you tend to feel at your most gallant, but every king or queen needs a loyal knight to serve them and we’ve found just the man for the job. Always at hand when they need him the most, he won’t shy away from coming to their aid in even the most, er, challenging of situations.
We’re not sure how far the constitution goes as far as ring marks on tables are concerned, but if you know someone who’s passionate about defending their household surfaces then you might just hit a bullseye with this present. This set of heavy duty coasters are as much a conversation starter as they are a conservation effort so we’d definitely take a shot on them if we were you.
The last thing they’ll want to be doing on their 50th birthday is cleaning the shower in preparation for their overnight party guests (it doesn’t hurt to be optimistic about the scale of the celebrations!) Give them this practical, if unglamorous gift, and they (and their back!) will thank you in the long run!
Flowers don’t just look nice and fill the air with pleasant aromas, they also carry various levels of symbolism. Much like the zodiac, each month has its own flower variety, reflecting the character of everyone born therein. Or at least, that’s what someone decided a long time ago. And it sure is a nice idea. Regardless of whether the person you’re buying for really is a carnation at heart, or whether they’re more of a Venus fly trap, these earrings are going to look great on them.
The ability to make your own yogurt is something you only really come to appreciate at a certain age – it’s usually around 50, we believe. Give them this culinary gift, and watch as they delight in whipping up their own ¬blends of strawberry, raspberry, or if they’re feeling adventurous, maybe even gooseberry!
As a person approaches the big 5-0, the long walk from the couch to the fridge can start to feel unbearable. They begin to crave being able to reach down and produce a new, freshly chilled beer, with zero effort. It’s the small things. This genius table will keep their laziness secret when guests come over.
It’s a big claim, we know. But yes, apparently all of life’s mysteries can be explained using flow charts, and this handy book has collected them all together. Give this to the 50th birthday recipient who has always wondered about the meaning of life, and berated the lack of a sufficient diagram to explain it.
The perfect gift for the 50-year-old who’s always getting lost in the dark, tripping down the stairs on their way back from the bathroom, or struggling to summon The Batman, the light from this flashlight is visible from five nautical miles away. They’ll never need to fear the Joker again!
Humanity’s relationship with fire spans hundreds of thousands of years – further back than even your 50-year-old can remember. Give them this for their special birthday, and allow them to indulge their inner caveman or woman with this ultra-modern take on the ancient discovery. What would our ancestors make of us now?
Ice cream is widely known for its mystical ability to bring joy to all, so you can be assured that bestowing the gift of being able to conjure it from mere ice and cream will go down well. Better still, your 50th birthday recipient will be able to make any flavor they can imagine. Sorcery!
Polaroids may be dead, but the people who like to use them aren’t. Not all of them anyway. There’s something especially gratifying about holding a tangible photograph, especially in a world dominated by virtual commodities where everything is becoming digital. Having an instant printer on hand means they don’t have to wait for a photo printing company to print their photos from the cloud and mail them by horseback or whatever. And we all know that nobody has time to wait for a horse these days. Oh, and we should also mention: these look way better than Polaroids.
A magical gift that works silently in the background to fill the home with scented mist – just what your 50-year-old has always wanted. Give them this and in a matter of minutes, their home will go from smelling faintly of wet dog, leftover takeout and regret, to delicious oranges, lavender or peppermint.
If humans were meant to fly, the logic goes, we would have been born with wings. Well, logic is an overrated buzzkill. Leaving the earth and relying on your own wits to return in one piece is something everyone should experience. Give the middle finger to gravity and biological destiny.
Nothing quite makes an impression like someone who has a giant tool and knows how to handle it. Get everybody within a half-mile radius drunk in one fell swoop with this absurdly proportioned mixology shaker. A brain-cell smiter of truly biblical proportions.
Chess pieces may look cool, but they’re extremely dated. Here’s a chess board that makes use of something they can relate to: drinking vessels that help them forget everything they hate about their life. Don’t worry, they’ve kept the little horses and whatnot. Now you can just drink out of them.
What better object to have in hand while you’re getting drunk than a grimacing skull to remind you of your own mortality? Rendered in stunningly intricate detail, this guy really comes to life when you fill him up with a colored liquor. Just like someone else you know.
The morning drinker: one of the most misunderstood fellow citizens. Once imbued with the spark of firewater, they can do anything, especially if it’s delivered with the bold energy rush of caffeine. You think we should eradicate morning drinking? Well, you can kiss all your favorite novels goodbye then, because all great authors are drunk by 10 am. But I guess if you want to try tricking someone out of their morning cup of whiskey, this would be the best way.
Bacon is the official food of the month, every month of the year. Now somebody has gone a step further and made a delivery service with a special kind of bacon for every month. Every time we go a level deeper with bacon it just gets better. Rumor has it Elon Musk is working on a bacon replicating machine. It’s about time he did something useful.
If there’s one skill that every responsible citizen should have, it’s the ability to access things that aren’t theirs. But you better believe you don’t get there without practice. Some day they’re bound to come across something they want that has been locked away by some other thoughtless and selfish human. Don’t let them approach this dark situation unprepared.
Musical genius is not a prerequisite for this delightful sound machine. Whether it’s cranking out an original score or “Born to Be Wild,” the sweet melodies of this tabletop hurdy gurdy will capture the ears and lighten the hearts of all those who gather ’round for a listen. Add this customizable heirloom to the instrument collection and inspire a newfound appreciation for all things classic.
Back when old people were kids, shadow puppeteering was accepted as a legitimate skill. That meant holding your hands in front of a light to create rudimentary animal shapes on the wall, because there was no internet. These candleholders are a serious step up. Just try making a mature cedar with your hands. Ok, stop. It’s not going to happen.
Buy them a couple tickets to a great event or show as a little test. Will they give the extra ticket to you? You just gave them this very thoughtful gift, after all. Or do they keep them both. In which case, maybe they just get a box of chocolates from the drug store next time.
What better way to say that the pen is mightier than the sword? This knight pen holder will be their most loyal servant in all of their clerical crusades. Whether they’re battling with the bookkeeping or feuding with their filing, help will be at hand. And yes, their grocery lists deserve the royal treatment too.
